My inital reaction to the news that Ashton Kutcher is replacing Charile Sheen on Two and a Half Men was No! Oh please no! Of course I was forgetting that Kutcher was quite lovable and dare I say good on That 70's Show. Too many big screen flops marred my positive image of his ... ahem ... acting skills. In the skill of looking damn sexy though, no problem there. I was/maybe still is a huge Charlie Sheen fan. Old habits die hard, as evidenced with Sheen himself, and I've been high on him since the days of Ferris Bueller and Platoon. Replacing a huge personality on a top rated television show isn't going to be easy for CBS. It's like taking Hugh Laurie off of House and sending in ... anyone else. Or trying to pawn off an Angry Bird for Big Bird on Sesame Street. It would just feel wrong wrong wrong!
I mean, look what happened to Van Halen when David Lee Roth left! Sammy Hagar fans need not comment here.
But perhaps most shocking is Jon Cryer's reaction.
THE Jon Cryer, also so well loved in the 80s like my Charlie. The Duck Man from Pretty In Pink o how I love you so for the use of the word jazzed. He did however use it to describe how he felt that the show was coming back. Cha-ching! Of course he was, as he well should be. But on the subject of Kutcher, Cryer did a little tap dance:
Ashton is an extraordinarily talented guy, and his presence will be an asset to our show. We are old friends from our male modeling days, and we're both looking forward to being judged for our comedic artistry, as opposed to our exceptional physical beauty.
He also said he would miss Sheen and is proud of all the work they did together. Jon, such a class act ... so much like Duckie, flying under the radar to Sheen and now to Ashton who will have all eyes on him when Two and a Half Men starts up again. But replacing Sheen just isn't going to happen easily. Cryer knows that. Maybe he's just playing nice-nice. I've got a plan, though, that I want to share with Men creator Chuck Lorre. It's actually my friend Priscilla's plan, who is a big fan of the show. Ready? Here's the script:
There was an episode back in 2008 with Charlie's real life brother Emilio Estevez (Demi Moore connection -- Ashton's wife! OMG!). Emilio played a friend that died and they were at his funeral but enter dream sequence and it's Charlie in the coffin, Cryer saying an incredible eulogy and Charlie gets the message he should straighten up or he would end up dead, too. So, for the return of the show, they could do an episode and really kill Charlie off, using clips from that one (seen below), only to find out that their mom had another son. Enter Ashton Kutcher! (Payment for use of this plot accepted by PayPal by the way.)
Wow, Jon Cryer is hilarious!:
And let's just backtrack for a second. Besides being in St. Elmo's Fire together, Demi Moore was engaged to Emilio Estevez back when Ashton was like 7 (seriously). And Demi, Ashton, and Emilio were all in the movie Bobby together, because the exes remained friends. How sweet. I can't help but think of Ashton as a total toe-stepping Angry Bird type. But at least Cryer is jazzed.
What do you think of Jon Cryer's reaction? What do you think of the plot idea of making Ashton the unknown brother?
Image via YouTube