'Real Housewives of Orange County' Recap: Smoke & Tears

Julie Ryan Evans

Alexis BellinoThe fact that Peggy Tanous dated Alexis Bellino's husband, Jim, previously explains a lot of the tension we saw between the women on tonight's episode of The Real Housewives of Orange County. What I see no explanation for, however, is what any woman could see in that controlling, condescending guy.

He's apparently too good to hang out with the rest of the group, which Alexis finally admitted to Peggy as the reason Jim wasn't at her dinner party. Yes, Jesus Barbie lied when she said he had business that night, but no worries, because "God will forgive me," she explained. Well, lie away then. She told Peggy there are "certain people" he just can't be around, which then forayed into a Lamborghini pissing match (Bethenny Frankel's term) about which of their husbands has owned more of them. It was truly nauseating and erased almost any sympathy one might have for reports of them both losing their homes due to financial problems.

For the Bellinos, perhaps Alexis's clothing line, Alexis Couture, can help ease the financial pain, especially because each item will feature a picture of none other than Alexis (just what everyone wants!). In the process of getting said pictures, Alexis smoked things up -- not because she was hot (she was not), but because a smoke machine set off the fire alarms in the St. Regis hotel in which they were shooting. Fortunately for Alexis, they got one good shot; too bad for the other guests who were sleeping or otherwise enjoying their stay.

Of course, you can't really blame Alexis for much of anything she does, because she just does what Jim tells her to do -- you know, like what the Bible tells her to do ... or at least her version of what the Bible tells her to do. "He's my husband, I have to listen," she told the cameras after he ordered her about in various poses in the creepiest of ways. Gag.

Meanwhile, Peggy was off making new friends with Tamra Barney and Vicki Gunvalson. She invited them wine tasting, during which they had a fabulous time bonding and making fun of Alexis for her strong desire to be Peggy and roll around in her sheets. They pointed out how Peggy and Alexis have the exact same voice, which I had never noticed before. Once I started listening for it, it was a bit freaky. Anyway, all was going well until Peggy couldn't stop asking Vicki about Donn.

Vicki totally broke down. While saying everything was perfect, it was quite clear it wasn't. She didn't share much with the other ladies, but she told the camera how she and Donn are pretty much done and that her world and marriage "are falling apart." It was really sad, even if she is overbearing and obnoxious.

I can't even bear to discuss the whole Slade Smiley and Gretchen Rossi storyline about him not having a job beyond managing Gretchen, but really having one that no one can understand. It's just too boring and stupid. I will say his mother who was visiting was pretty cool (she asked him if he'd consider going back to law school, ha!), and that it was nice to see he finally washed his hair.

Finally, Tamara and Fernanda Rocha cleared up the matter of that little kiss they shared in the bathroom. For Tamra it was just fun; Fernanda still maintains it "was not a normal kiss" and seems smitten with Tamra. In the end they agreed that each was a "wonderful person" and toasted to "kissing in bathrooms." Cheers.

Do you think Alexis Bellino is jealous of Peggy Tanous? Do you think Alexis is crazy to always defer to her husband?

Image via bravotv.com

Read More