Looks like Leonardo DiCaprio and Bar Refaeli are riding the express train to Breakupville (did you know they were still dating?). Personally, I'm scared. Doesn't some big, natural disaster always happen when two disgustingly attractive people call it quits? Haven't you noticed the little earthquake tremors every time Us Weekly prints an issue with bad things about Brad and Angelina on the cover? I like to think of it as God's way of reminding us all that we're ugly.
Apparently, Leo and Bar have hit a rough patch, and they're having trouble smoothing things out. Monday night, after the Met ball (you know that supergala with all the crazy dresses that we'll never be invited to), Bar went to one awesome after-party, and Leo went to another. Hmm ...
On one hand, I hate to see them break up, 'cause they're just so damn pretty. But on the other, it's like, spread the wealth, guys. Here are 5 women who would look extra yummy on Leo's arm.
Mila Kunis. Despite her rumored affairs with Justin Timberlake, I think Mila and Leo would make an excellent couple. Their names even sound good together -- Mila and Leo, Leo and Mila. They sound like two cats. She would also be a nice deviation from the usual gals Leo goes for -- serious models, who are very fun to look at, but boring to listen to. Let us pray.
Kate Bosworth. Sure, she falls under the "more fun to look at than to listen to" umbrella, but I like Kate Bosworth. She seems like a very pleasant, all-American gal who kills it with her clothes. And, come to think of it, she and Leo almost look like they could be brother and sister, which could either be really great for their children or really ... creepy. Yeah, that's gross. Never mind.
Pippa Middleton. Oh, come on. Like you didn't think of it either. Hottest new commodity plus tried-and-true commodity? It would be a match made in Hollywood heaven. Imagine the tabloids? Dude, we would all be able to wallpaper our entire houses with magazine tear-outs of the two. And don't try to tell me you never wanted a Leonardo DiCaprio/Pippa Middleton study. I've read your diary. I know your secrets.
Rosie Huntington-Whiteley. The Transformers star/Victoria's Secret model is all over the place lately. Also, let's all just take a moment to reflect on Rosie's "job" -- Transformers star and Victoria's Secret model. Um, could there be anything more orgasmic for a dude? Throw "professional pizza maker" on the end of that description, who knows what will happen?
Olivia Wilde. Her ex-husband is the son of an Italian prince. Really, the only way to top that is with a little Leo.
Who do you think Leo should date if he and Bar break up (besides you)?
Image via aznviolaguy/Flickr