antonio sabato jr. wifeAs far as I'm concerned, celebs -- or anyone else, for that matter -- can name their kids whatever whacked-out, crazy thing they want: Apple, Coco, Maddox. Who cares? This philosophy applies doubly to middle names ... hey, I'm no celebrity and I still gave my son the middle name of Leopold and I've since been told he's destined to be either a king or a pope. 

But even I must take issue with the middle name Antonio Sabato Jr. gave his son this weekend: Welcome, Antonio Kamakanaalohamaikalani Harvey Sabato III!

I bet you think I just fell asleep at my laptop and that string of incomprehensible letters is the result of my forehead banging against the keyboard. But no! It's true, I am not making this up. Sabato and his wife, Cheryl, chose the Hawaiian name for its meaning: beloved gift from the heavens. That's sweet, but why not just call the kid Antonio Beloved Gift From the Heavens Harvey Sabato III? That version has about the same amount of letters, plus it serves the same dual purpose as those cool Native American names that spell out a person's whole personality/purpose in life, like Dances With Wolves. (Although, yikes -- god help the woman who marries a man who thinks he's a beloved gift from the heavens.)

I just keep thinking about those writing worksheets they send home from school in kindergarten, the ones printed with your kid's full name to practice tracing. Can you imagine? No 5-year-old should have to stay up past midnight to finish his homework. That's just wrong.

Do you think Antonio Sabato Jr. went too far?

 

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