Finally, our first casualty on American Idol. Forgive me for being so excited about kids getting voted off, but it's high time we trimmed the fat from this group of 13. There are just a few things I think we need to talk about from last night's episode. The result shows are always a disaster -- the group numbers, the Ford Focus "music video," and of course, the tears.
Let's start with the giant cauliflower ear that was growing out of J. Lo's bicep.
I am a giant fan of a puffy sleeve. Huge even. But a one-shoulder puff sleeve is like a pie without the crust. It's good ... but it's kind of missing something. But J. Lo wasn't the worst fashion offender of the night. Can we please talk about all those gosh darn FEATHERS.
Are the girls trying to win Steven's approval by dressing like slutty Pocahontases? Every girl seemed to have dangling, shoulder dusting feather earrings, but Lauren Alaina took it one step further and freaking weaved a bird through her hair. What was THAT look. It was a combination of those string hair wraps we gave each other at camp and the Fabio meets Pigeon collision on the roller coaster.
Now on to the mansion they live in. It's downright gorgeous and there's so much ro ... wait. Why are these kids sleeping in twin beds in the same room? They look like they're in an orphanage. The house is the size of a mall, yet these poor kids have to listen to one another snore and whisper to their boyfriends all night long.
And the group number. Was that not the weirdest combo of live singing and pre-recorded singing you've ever seen? Some of the kids (ahem Paul and James) looked lost. I wonder if the producers told each contestant who would sing live and who would lip synch. The politics of Idol will forever fascinate.
Diddy Dirty Money performed and so did Adam Lambert. Solid thumbs up to Diddy, solid blah to Adam. He looked good though, just not a fan of the song. It was like a screechy coming-of-age show tune number. I will refrain from commenting on his bassist. Just kidding! I'm not sure if that was a boy or a girl, but he/she took the feather trend to the extreme and looked like the spawn of Big Bird who had sex with Lloyd Christmas during a scene for Something About Mary.
The results were actually given pretty fast, which was great. Karen, Haley, and Ashthon were in the bottom three. Slightly surprised about Karen, but that Selena imitation was kind of awks, so I get it.
We nailed this one folks: Ashthon was sent home. Buh-bye. Have fun in high school!
Oh, and I think I would be remiss if I didn't mention the only laugh-out-loud moment of the evening ... "teach me how to Dougie." When J. Lo started grooving in her seat, I forgot all about her veggie outfit and got lost in her moves.
Did they announce a theme for next week? I didn't catch it.
Do you think Ashthon should've been sent home? If not, who?
Photo via YouTube