Imagine if your parents—your aging parents who never know why that thing is installed on their desktop, and who definitely don't understand this YooHooTube business—were tasked with the job of creating a viral video. You know, for the kids.
Then imagine that Jennifer Aniston showed up in order to gamely play along (making sure we all understand how adorably clueless she is about the Internet, presumably because she has more important things to do, like star in 581,023 shitty rom-coms), while relentlessly trying to convince us that purchasing expensive plastic bottles of water doesn't corn-hole the environment and in fact will give you glossy hair and toned abs.
The result? A painfully lame video from Smartwater.
The ad (which I can't believe didn't debut during the Super Bowl) features Aniston and a host of viral marketing hallmarks, including puppies, dancing CGI babies (gahhhh), and—of course—the Double Rainbow Guy. Keenan Cahill makes an appearance, there's an obligatory kick to the crotch, and a parrot who tells Aniston, "Rachel, I love your hair."
At the end, Aniston starts tossing her beloved hair around in slo-mo, allows some water to slobber "sexily" from her mouth (ew), and the fake ad team that's standing by announces that they'll name it "Jen Aniston's Sex Tape."
Take a look at this cinematic masterpiece:
What do you think? Are you gripped with an irresistible urge to buy Smartwater?
Image via YouTube