'Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' Reunion Fun, Part 1

on January 28, 2011 at 10:15 AM

real housewives beverly hills

Last night on the first of two The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reunion specials, the ladies finally got a chance to answer their critics, explain themselves, and very civilly discuss everything that went down during their wild, crazy season in the 90210.

Oh, I'm sorry. Did I say "civilly discuss"? What I meant was "yell at each other like spray tanned crackheads." Oops.

In case you haven't seen a Housewives reunion special before, it's basically Bravo's Andy Cohen, aka the bravest man in television, asking the ladies questions from viewers. Last night he started off with a query about why the ladies get so much plastic surgery that they look deformed. However, instead of answering, "I don't know, Jill Smith from Dubuque, Iowa, why do you look like a premenstrual Sasquatch?" which would have been awesome, they smoothly blew it off and said something about doing it to "feel good." But next comes an even harder question: "How much does a gallon of milk cost?" After a few moments of hemming and hawing, Kyle shouts, "$3.49!" And then her sister Kim rather endearingly adds, "It's less than that at Costco!"

Stars. They're just like US!

Next we move on to such varied topics as Taylor's pillow pet lips and the size of Lisa's mansion (17,000 sq. feet), and then Andy trains his puppy dog eyes on everybody's favorite Kelsey Grammer ex-wife, Camille, who's wearing a dress that can barely contain her right boob. Camille is barraged with a long list of probing and sometimes insulting questions, including, "Did you use a surrogate so you could keep your figure?" She denies it, then says Kyle mentioned it on the show, which Kyle then denies. HOWEVER, I totally remember hearing Kyle say that when they were on the plane flying to Sacramento. Anyone else? Bueller? Back me up here.

Camille admirably fields questions about the Playboy layout and Skinemax movie she did in her younger days ("It wasn't hard core, it was soft!") and then they show a very sad clip of her interactions with Kelsey that makes Adrienne tear up. Andy asks if it's true Camille has a sex tape, to which Taylor opines, "Who'd watch a sex tape of married people over 40 having sex? We'd have to pay people to buy it." Yep, especially if it starred her husband Russell who's about as sexy as a piece of low-fat bologna covered in rancid mayonnaise. (Too much?)

We then move on to the Taylor v. Kim season-long animosity, which is soooooo boring because it's not like they pulled each other's hair or anything. (And Kim looked like she couldn't be any more uncomfortable all night, didn't you think?) However, when they discuss the infamous NYC dinner, Taylor mysteriously whispers to Kyle, "Should we bring up her state of mind?" Quel intrigue! Hopefully we'll hear more about that next week and less about Taylor "goin' Oklahoma on your ass" which is seriously played out.

Andy then brings up how rich the housewives are, and actually asks Adrienne how much money she has. Yep, bad manners there Mr. Cohen. (Although, I would kind of like to know since I'm currently trying to get adopted by the Maloofs.) When he asks Lisa if she even has any poor friends, she very wittily responds, "Only you, Andy." Booyah! Vanderpump IN DA HOUSE!

Now let's talk about the season-long fight between Kyle and Camille over something that may or may not have been said. Honestly, could they please find something else to hate each other over? Snooki and J-Woww would have settled this shit in about two seconds and then smooshed some juiceheads in the hot tub before passing out in their own vomit. Anyway, Kyle tells us that she was the one who got Camille on the show in the first place, and then Camille says she only did that because she "needed a target." Really, Camille? Did you think there was that much planning and scheming going on behind the scenes? It's BRAVO. Not the CIA.

They then yell and scream at each other for a few minutes while everyone else looks like they'd like to disappear, and finally Andy says something about the people who get most upset at being called insecure are ... insecure people. Word to your mutha, Andy.

Next week: More Reunion Drama!

Filed Under: real housewives, reality tv

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Comments (3)

kelsbecca619

on Jan 28, 2011 at 10:46 AM

I feel totally dumb for posting the first comment but I think Kyle or Taylor said the comment about the surrogacy thing. ONe of them said in a private interview session. " thats a good way to keep that nice figure of yours". I know you dont have to spill the beans on WHY you would or wouldnt use one but cmon I might be a little more open to "hey I just couldnt have kids and this was the only way" NOT that the others are to judge but everyone of them has biological children and STILL look good.. I just find it kind of hard to believe. Anyways someone else help me figure out the mystery behind who really said that. And I do feel HORRIBLE for Camille it was very painful to watchall that go down, but I hate that she used it as an excuse to bully Kyle and YES anyone with eyes and ears knows she bullied her and not the other way around! Gosh that frustrates me! Now back to REAL life in Oklahoma! ( btw Taylor was trying to tell Kim if you dont shut up I am gonna whoop your ass!) duh take the hint and shut it KIm!

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Facebook comment from Dorothy Smith

on Jan 28, 2011 at 12:46 PM

I really don't like Kyle or Taylor with smiles as fake as thier faces. Kyle is a bully. She bully's her own sister all the time.

I have a question, What does the word real mean? None of the housewives are real and I don't mean just plastice surgery. A housewife is someone who is married and takes care of a house and children. None of the ladies on any of the housewives shows do this. Hey, not all of them are married either and shacking up does not count as married.

Facebook comment from Jessica Sims

on Jan 29, 2011 at 2:24 AM

Ok I know this is going to make me sound like a real dork (or a die hard fan..but whatever lol) but I actually have the whole season of the RHOBH DVR'd and this is how it went down. Everyone was in the private plane going to Vegas and then the women started talking about when they had there babies. Camille said that by having a surrogate she was able to keep her figure. She said this in a not- really- noticeable- joking- way but it was suppose to make the viewer think that she had her kids via surrogate only for the reason of keeping her figure. The camera then goes to its individual interviews and Kyle is saying how she knows people who will "give there right arm to have (carry) a baby"

SO...to sum it up Camille actually said it but Kyle commented and the viewer (US) was suppose to think that Camille only had her children via surrogate to keep her figure.

BOOM