Yesterday, Spencer Pratt's rap debut made me want to rip my hair out. And today, Heidi Montag is riding his musical coattails with the release of her new single, "Heartbeat." I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that the back-to-back music releases are no coincidence. It's a shocker really -- who knew the duo was so musical?
"Heartbeat" is actually Montag's second songstress attempt. Her first was with last year's debut album, Superficial, which was an utter flop -- it sold only an embarrassing 658 copies in its first week. So this new track must be BOMB if she's coming back for more after such an epic failure, right?
Sadly, not so much.
I just can't help but ask why!? It sounds like Montag is actually intoxicated. In some ways, "Heartbeat" reminds me of the newest Britney track. At first, listening to it was painful. But then, you get used to the lame lyrics and start tapping your foot to the beat. While that may not be happening anytime here with Heids, there's always hope. AND -- comparing "Heartbeat" to Spencer's "Ain't No Thing," Montag's song truly has potential. But I guess that's not saying much.
Aren't there better things that this power couple could be doing with their time? Some examples:
Shovel snow: With snow storms slamming the country, we need all the help we can get. Snowpocalpyse schmopocolpyse as long as Speidi's on the scene!
Babysit: After hearing that they already sold the photo rights of their yet-to-be-conceived child, I'm thinking Heidi and Spencer could definitely use a few lessons in childcare. AND -- think about how great naptime would be on Heidi's pillows? Hell, sign me up.
Pull an Angelina Jolie: No matter why you're famous, using your fame for a good cause is admirable. Whether you're Lady Gaga taking a stand for gay rights or George Clooney rallying for independence in Sudan, there's something to be said for celebrity activism. Just erm, try to avoid malaria at all costs.
Film a new reality show: I just can't help but be addicted to the horrible and unnecessary drama that follows this power couple. Sure, there are other ways to get my reality TV fix. But watching Heidi's facial expressions post-plastic surgery is just SO entertaining.
What do you think of Heidi's new song?
Image via YouTube