You GUYS. You are totally not going to believe this, but I have found the perfect last-minute holiday gift for you.
I mean, I don't want to brag, but I think you could spend the rest of the week scouring the stores and not find anything quite like this. And here's the best part: as of this writing, all you need to purchase this one-of-a-kind present is just $17,000!
For a measly 17 grand, you can be the proud owner of Ashton Kutcher's "morning after" sweater -- the clothing item he allegedly gave to his alleged mistress Brittney Jones after a night of engaging in alleged dirty adult activities on the living room couch of the house where he is allegedly monogamous with wife Demi Moore.
Jones has posted a photo of the sweater on eBay along with the following item description:
This sweater was given to me after spending the night with Ashton. I no longer have any attachment to this sweater and I am hoping someone else will enjoy it.
The sweater was listed with a starting bid of $500, but naturally people know a good deal when they see it: it's had 37 bids so far.
Don't less this fantastic gift pass you by -- you've got until Christmas Eve to make someone's dreams come true this holiday season! Can't you just imagine the look of joy on their face as they unwrap what will surely become their most prized possession of all time?
Sure, there's no earthly way to prove this sweater ever belonged to a celebrity and you'd have to be a deranged idiot to give this skank tens of thousands of dollars for the effort of creating a one-line eBay entry that's probably complete bullshit ... but with a little Christmas magic, you can almost believe.
Image via eBay