Celebrity Rehab is just one big melting pot of hot messes (like every other reality show, but at least that's the point of this one). It seems that Dr. Drew Pinsky has his work cut out for him on this season.
The D-list celebrities that he's trying to help turn around definitely have their baggage -- in forms of heroine, cocaine, alcohol, domestic abuse ... the list goes on.
So who will succeed and who will fail?
Jeremy London: Actor in Party of Five and Mallrats
Lowest Public Moment: Claimed he was kidnapped and was forced to take drugs. Uh, yeah, that screams crazy.
Chance for Recovery: He's trying to sober up to be a good dad to his 3-year-old son, so with that motivation, we're going to give him a 7.
Jason Davis: Heir to 20th Century Fox fortune. Also goes by the name "Gummi Bear."
Lowest Public Moment: He yelled at his own grandmother. At a red carpet event.
Chance for Recovery: Knowing that he's already been to rehab once and left before treatment was complete, I'm going to give him a 3 out of sheer benefit of the doubt.
Janice Dickinson: Former supermodel turned crazy reality star.
Lowest Public Moment: During a guest spot on Finland's version of Top Model, she mixed Champagne and sleeping pills, which caused her to take a tumble down the stairs and burst out at the models.
Chance for Recovery: She's only still making headlines because of her outrageous outbreaks. Since being in the spotlight is so important for her, I'm going to give her a 4.
Leif Garrett: Former teen pop sensation.
Lowest Public Moment: Back in 1979, he caused a horrific car accident while driving under the influence of Quaaludes, which left his best friend paralyzed for life.
Chance for Recovery: He's been on a downward spiral for the last two decades, but now that his mom is battling lung cancer, I think it's going to be important for him to kick the heroin habit -- 8.
Frankie Lons: Mom to R&B singer Keyshia Cole and reality star.
Lowest Public Moment: This video kinda takes the cake. Holla!
Chance for Recovery: She's been messed up for a looooong time. You can lead a silver grilled horse to water, but you can't make him drink -- 5.
Rachel Uchitel: Known only for being Tiger Woods's whore mistress.
Lowest Public Moment: She had a fiance who died in the World Trade Center on 9/11. Sad story, right? Well only after the celebrity scandal has ended did she come forward and talk about it, using it to land a book deal.
Chance for Recovery: It's not like she's a real celebrity, so these scandals are the source for her paycheck -- 2.
Jason Wahler: Reality star, former beau to Lauren Conrad.
Lowest Public Moment: Arrested for punching a girl.
Chance for Recovery: He wants to sober up so he can get his life back on track and go to college. Not a lot standing in his way, so we're going to give him an 8.
Eric Roberts: Golden Globe and Academy Award nominated actor.
Lowest Public Moment: Domestic violence arrests in 1991 and 1995.
Chance for Recovery: He and his sister, Julia Roberts, reconciled in 2004, and I think he has since slowly tried to change his ways. With the help of Dr. Drew Pinsky, I think he may succeed -- 9.
What do you think of the cast? Who do you think will be successful and who do you expect to fail?
Image via VH1.com