Taylor Swift 'Mean': Another Whiny Teenage Tune

Julie Ryan Evans

taylor swiftTaylor Swift's new song "Mean" is now available for download on iTunes ... if you want to subject yourself to more of her silly, immature whining.

Her music started out kind of cute and catchy when she sang about Tim McGraw and her high school crushes, but she's never moved on. Instead she's stuck in the land of teenage diary drama and passive-aggressive notes and Facebook posts set to music.

The rest of her album Speak Now, which is set to be released October 25, is kind of like her own personal slam book. She supposedly takes on John Mayer in "Dear John" with lyrics like:

It was wrong/Don't you think nineteen's too young/To be played/By your dark, twisted games/When I loved you so ... You'll add my name to your long list of traitors who don't understand/And I'll look back in regret I ignored what they said "Run as fast as you can."

Word has it that the tune "Better Than Revenge" is aimed at Camilla Belle for her involvement with Taylor's ex Joe Jonas soon after they broke up. It reportedly includes lines like: "I think her ever-present frown is a little troubling/She thinks I'm psycho because I like to rhyme her name with things."

Not to be "mean," but: Grow up already, Taylor. We get the whole artistic expression thing, but there's a whole world out there beyond high school and writing songs about every person who has ever wronged you.

You have a lovely voice, but you're 20 now. High school is long over, and it's time to graduate to some more mature matters.

Unfortunately since she's selling so many records and has legions of fans, she'll likely stay in the land of whiny teenage tunes. In that case, here are some suggestions for tunes she can croon:

Pimples Suck Though she of the porcelain skin looks as if she's never seen one in her life, I'm sure she could craft something about her fear of them.

My Parents Don't Get Me It's been a long time since the Beastie Boys took on parents in "Fight for Your Right"; it may be time for Taylor to whine about curfews and parents who just don't understand. Speaking of which, maybe she could team up with Willow Smith and remake her daddy's tune "Parents Just Don't Understand."

Alone in the Cafeteria It could become the anthem for lonely kids in the cafeteria everywhere.

Denied Cheerleader Status The heartbreak over not getting poms poms could perhaps fill an entire album.

What do you think of Taylor Swift's new song, "Mean"?

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