I was joking the other day that after the Christina Aguilera/Jordon Bratman and Courteney Cox/David Arquette breakups, Nick Cannon had better watch his back. Being as how it looks like a bad streak for goofy-looking celebrity-marrying husbands and all.
It looks like he might need to watch his face, though, if there's any truth to the rumors that 50 Cent is hooking up with Chelsea Handler, because Cannon had himself a little Twitter hissy fit last week and tried his level best to rip Chelsea a new one.
It started when Chelsea tweeted, “I just heard nick cannon is starting a comedy tour. Who’s going to do the comedy?” (Which: okay, rude. But funny.)
Cannon responded with a series of tweets apparently designed to prove her point that he's not exactly known for his comedic genius:
@50cent was hitting @chelseahandler they was just sharing testosterone tips.
Just talked to @50Cent He said he made @chelseahandler get G-Unit tattooed on her balls!
@chelseahandler Looks like she got hit in the face with a hot bag nickels.
Everyone knows @Chelseahandler had sec with the head of E! for her show. So when its caneled [sic] does he get residual p**sy for the reruns.
@Chelseahandler @Howardstern @Eminem Why do all these angry ugly whitetrash folks want beef with me? What I do? I'm a harmless corny dude!
@chelseahandler is like the new @joanrivers just without the funny and more plastic surgery
After his foot-stamping Handler-bashing meltdown, Nick apparently got his widdle feewings hurt when some Twitter users called him out for being a bit of a douchebag. He wrote:
I never start stuff with anyone. I like making people smile. But y'all know the enemy is busy... but I will not be bullied...
Oh, Twitter. How did we ever enjoy the illiterate ramblings of celebrities before social networking? It's like a whole new world, one where we can enjoy the fact that highly-paid Hollywood stars are often every bit as mature as tantruming preschoolers. I'm waiting for the next tweet in this so-called 'war': "YOU'RE A POOPY BUTT!"
Image via NBC