Comedian Mark Malkoff Moves Into Bathroom to Overcome Addiction

Brittny Drye
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Mark MalkoffI am completely aware that I'm somewhat unhealthily addicted to the Internet.

I check Facebook constantly, have witty thoughts that consist of 140 characters or less, and now with that blasted Facebook Places feature, I'm "checking in" to every location I walk into.

Am I doing anything about it? Hell to the naw. I've just come to terms and accepted that that's how our society operates (isn't it?). But comedian Mark Malkoff is putting a stop to his addiction by cutting himself off completely and camping out in a bathtub.

He writes on his blog:

"My solution is to go on a 5-day online cleanse. In the past, I've tried to stop using the Internet in my daily life and lasted only a few hours. But for this to really work, I need a place with zero distractions and temptations. And I have found that very place. it's located ... in my BATHROOM. This is where I will remain 24/7 for the next five days from Monday August 23rd until Saturday August 28th. No Internet. No iPhone. No TV. No laptop. No Twitter. No Facebook. No email. No news sites.

For me, that sounds like pure torture. Especially with the icky pink tiling and the fact that the bathroom is smaller than a jail cell in Alcatraz (seriously ... he measured it).

To keep himself from dying of boredom, he's made a list of things that he wants to accomplish, which include memorizing the U.S. presidents in order, writing letters to loved ones, learning how to knit, finger painting, making a list of 99 reasons he loves his wife, and learning how to play "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" on the guitar.

That seems like a lot to do in just five days, but then again, if you take technology out of the equation, I'm sure you're left with a massive void to fill. I just hope he watches out for the dishes when he pees.

Are you addicted to the Internet? Could you completely turn off technology for a whole five days (bathroom living not necessary)?

 

Image via MarkMalkoff.com

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