Lindsay Lohan, Step Away From Twitter

Amy Keyishian
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http://twitter.com/lindsaylohan/
Good lord, she's done it again: Lindsay Lohan had a double-whammy of a tweet-week. First, she complained about ex Samantha Ronson; then she tweeted a recent photo shoot, which included a "shot" (get it??) of her pointing a gun at her puckered-up lips, and others of her half-naked and bathed in blood. Sweet.

But this is only the latest Twitterstorm she's caused: I don't know what it is with LiLo and Twitter. Sometimes, she acts as if she's texting her only friend, like when she's feeling lovelorn or bitchy. Sometimes it's like a web-based press conference -- a way to get publicity, which seems to work well 'til she gets peeved that the publicity isn't all positive. Sometimes it's the only way she communicates with her weirdo dad. But mostly, it's like a giant well of embarrassment that she can't seem to resist returning to.

Here are some of LiLo's most notorious Tweettroversies:

That Damn Sam:
A trio of tweets complained about Ronson asking her to leave a party. A quick check of Ronson's Twitter page from the same day reveals … nothing specifically about LiLo, but this interesting peek at events about a half hour before the furious outburst … Hmmm. Apparently there was spitting and/or ice-lobbing, too.

The Photo Shoot:
Two tweets, one video shoot: Lindsay sends out an "interesting" gun photo (link above) and links to a video of the shoot. Honestly? I don't see anything particularly shocking about the photos, except that they're crappy and amateurish. But tongues start wagging, which, I suppose, was the point.

Mad at Dad:
Mere weeks ago, Lindsay set Twitter afire with a  flame war against her crazy father, Michael Lohan. In a move that might seem like tough-love from a normal parent, he brought police to her apartment when he feared Lindsay's 16-year-old sister was using drugs with Lindsay after attending the Coachella music festival. Lindsay took it to Twitter, calling him pathological and lying and… well, all sorts of stuff, while he took it to Access Hollywood.

Topless! (No boobs, though):
What's a girl to do when she's getting ready for a fashion show? Snap a pic of herself topless, of course. And then when she's bored, tweet that pic to everyone. Lemme tell you: I'd do the first … maybe not so much the second. (First of all, how does that alleviate boredom? And second, oof-ah, the bony hips!)

More Samantha Drama:
Lindsay's relationship with Ronson was rife with drama, public fights, lockouts from the Chateau Marmont, and … this Twitter explosion, which was quickly deleted (but lives on because the internets are cruel).

One More Fight:
God. Seriously. Public fights? On Twitter? Bad enough to do this crap on a street corner, but can't you text each other directly?!

To her credit though, LiLo also re-tweeted the Twitter account LiLoTranslated, which pokes fun at her tweets. So, you know. There's that.

Poor gal. I want to feel bad for her, but it's hard when her choices are so flawed.

Why do you think Lindsay Lohan takes her turmoil to Twitter?

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