'Serial Pooper' Captured on Film, But Still on the Loose (PHOTO)

What the hell is this shit? That's what neighbors in Akron, Ohio have been asking themselves for quite awhile. Or maybe it's more like, "Whose shit is this?" Because the town has been lately overrun with an abundance of shit -- on cars, on lawns, on children's toys. And, nope, we're not talking lazy dog owners who don't pick up their pets' crap (even if a dog could crap on a car hood). We're talking real shit, like human shit. Everywhere. What the hell?! But thanks to a neighbor who played detective by setting up a secret spy cam, police finally have a face to match the feces.

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For three years, residents of this quiet Ohio neighborhood have been terrorized by piles of human waste left in the most unlikely places. At least 19 cars were defecated on -- and neighbors had started to blame each other.

But one wiley resident set up a time-lapse camera in hopes of capturing the culprit's shitty shenanigans -- and sure enough, the camera caught a picture of a man wearing a hat, and not wearing his pants. Or rather, he was pulling them down in the act of crapping all over the guy's car.

Given that the bowel movement bandit's face is pretty clear in the photo (as is his ass), it's probably just a matter of time before the craptastic crapper's crapping days come to a close.

Why would anyone do this? Is the man angry at the town? Angry at the lack of public toilets? Does he just hate cars? Maybe he ate too many bran muffins? Or perhaps he is so enamored of his own shit that he wants to leave it around for everyone to admire? Perhaps the man has a mental illness -- maybe no one should be poo-poohing this.

More from The Stir: The One Thing We're ALL Doing Wrong When We Poop

But also imagine you are this guy's wife, mother, girlfriend, or child ... I mean, this has got to be a shitty day for that person, yeah?

Hopefully police will soon undercover the mystery behind this man's prolific behind.

Have you seen this man's ass at work?

Image via Akron Police/Facebook

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