Woman Uses Breast Milk as Weapon While Robbing Store

spilled milkWe are all a bit on edge when it comes to bodily fluids. Ebola or no Ebola, no one wants anyone else's bodily fluids on them (without their consent, of course). Or if you're a parent and just so used to wiping your kid's boogers with your bare hands. And speaking of parents, one mom went a little berserk with her breast milk when "buying" a breast pump at her local pharmacy. Any woman who has used a breast pump knows that those things are like torture devices and induce stress. But this breastfeeding mama cannot be excused for squirting her breast milk at the pharmacist and the cashier and then stealing money from the register. What in the world?!?


This all happened in Darmstadt, Hesse, Germany. The woman was said to be speaking an unknown language and is described as "robust" with her long, dark hair fashioned in a ponytail. (Has anyone seen Octomom lately?) At around 4:25 p.m. she entered the store and asked to purchase the torture device ... I mean, breast pump. She handed over money to pay but then shocked everyone by exposing one breast to shoot breast milk at the pharmacist. And then she squirted more at a cashier. It sounds as if she not only made an impression by having her breast out, but spraying people with breast milk as she made her way down the aisles and to the counter. A real (different kind of) shoot 'em up.

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There is a little part of me that is thinking, WOW! She's one of those super producers whose milk supply is aplenty. Was she engorged? She must have planned this trip to the store right before a feeding. Breast milk as a weapon? It's certainly a weapon used to help kids fight off sickness and pump them up with all the best nature has to offer, but to rob and steal? What ingenuity. Um ... I mean, how horrible.

Sometimes crime is funny -- the method in which people commit a crime. And we already know we should never cry over spilled milk. Though spilled breast milk is worth crying over. Not for this robust woman, though. This is theft we are talking about, and awful -- no one should steal of course. But how can we not chuckle a little at this? Maybe, though, I should be angry. She sure is giving breastfeeding women a bad name.

What would you have done if you were witnessing this crime?


Image via M Yashna/Flickr

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