DWI Suspect With No Pants Tries to Escape & You’ll Never Believe How

toy truckEver have a night like this? You know, one of those nights that results in the following headline: "No-Pants DWI Suspect Tries to Flee in Toy Truck." You know what? I can probably answer that question for us all: I don't think any of us have ever had a night quite that bad. At least I hope not. Here's the shocking part. I mean, here's a shocking part not already included in the headline. That allegedly drunk, pantless person who tried to drive away in a toy truck? She was a woman. I know! I assumed it was a man, too, because it's usually men doing foolish shit like this. But no. Oh womankind!


Okay, so here's how it went down -- because you want details on this insanity, you know you do. Twenty-nine-year-old Jamie Craft was reportedly three times over the legal limit when she crashed her car into a mobile home. But since she's the hero of her own movie, she thought she could still make a grand escape! So she jumped into one of those battery-operated children's trucks and tried to drive off. Two men stopped her, she somehow stumbled to her mother's home, and she was finally arrested. And she did it all with no pants.

Ohhh, that's a nasty hangover.

It's like a nightmare episode of Wipeout, only without the water, or the dignity, or the prize. Never mind. Anyway, there are more details on this shame odyssey here. I'm just too sorry for Jamie to get into them. Suffice it to say, she's got a real mess to clean up, and she's lucky to be alive. I hope this is enough of a wake-up call for her to get some help. This story is everywhere now, and I can't imagine how embarrassed she must be. So embarrassed, in fact, that she probably feels like getting drunk again just to escape the shame! Someone please, get this woman an intervention, stat.

What's the worst thing you've seen someone do while drunk?


Image via Cale Bruckner/Flickr

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