Holly Madison Reveals the Depressing Truth About Living in the Playboy Mansion

Even though it seemed like a weird situation, what with multiple girls dating Hugh Hefner and all, didn't Holly Madison, Bridget Marquardt, and Kendra Wilkinson make life inside the Playboy Mansion seem like a blast on The Girls Next Door? Well Madison has penned a memoir on her time as a Playboy Bunny, and truth is much darker than what the series ever portrayed.


Aptly titled Down the Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures and Cautionary Tales of a Former Playboy Bunny (seriously, is that a great title for the subject or what?) Holly's tell-all reveals the nitty-gritty of what was involved with being one of Hefner's girlfriends.

Publisher Harper Collins released a statement about the memoir, saying that "Madison's seemingly fairy tale existence inside the Playboy Mansion was filled with drama, darkness, and even depression."

"Life inside the notorious Mansion wasn’t a dream at all -- and quickly became her nightmare ... After losing her identity, her sense of self-worth, and her hope for the future, Holly found herself sitting alone in a bathtub contemplating suicide."

Harper Collins also teased more insight into the "oppressive routine of strict rules, manipulation, and [her] battles with ambitious, backstabbing bunnies."

Holy crap! I mean, obviously there would be some difficulties involved with dating the King of the Playboy Empire, but the show made it seem like t was mostly just for show. The girls loved to party, dress up, collect tiny dogs, and wear lots of pink. They went on adventures, and seemed to have a really good time over all.

More from The Stir: Kendra Wilkinson Reveals What Her Sex Life With Hugh Hefner Was Like

I guess it's a lesson in the magic of reality TV cameras. Things are so heavily edited, it's hard to tell how much is really real. To take it further, it's a good lesson in judging other people's lives when you only see the shiny surface of what they choose to reveal to the world.

Madison has since moved on and is happily married to Pasquale Rotella, with whom she has a toddler daughter, Rainbow. Her Playboy days firmly behind her, she's ready to spill the beans.

She told Us Weekly, "I'm excited to finally share my story and what I've learned from my personal experiences both inside and outside of the Playboy Mansion ... I think my stories will surprise people and I'm looking forward to lifting the veil of mystique and clearing up the misconceptions so often associated with my life."

Are you surprised to hear that Holly Madison considered suicide while living at the Playboy Mansion?


Images via Holly Madison/Instagram & Harper Collins

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