Robert Pattinson's New Goatee Is Not Something Anyone Ever Needed to See (PHOTO)

Robert PattinsonApparently Robert Pattinson didn't get the memo about being back with Kristen Stewart. Because not only is he ALLEGEDLY dating Dylan Penn, but he grew a goatee! Duuuuuuude, you grow a goatee when you've broken up with a girl and you're all depressed and you write songs and poetry about her and send her sad little text messages. NOT when you're in full "we're baaack" mode!


Rob and his goatee showed up at the 6th annual GO GO Gala, which was the first time he'd taken Wispy out for a spin. His furry chin pal is kinda reddish and blondish. An eyewitness at the event vows that RPattz's goatee had a grand time at the bash, telling US Weekly:

They seem very attached to each other.

Haha. No, the spy actually said that Rob, "looked professional and put together. He wore a slick navy blue suit and had goatee, his hair was short and kind of buzzed on the side."

More From The Stir: Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart 'Getting Married': See the Announcement (PHOTO)

The spy also claims that Rob came alone -- which is obviously wrong, because he brought his goatee -- but I guess he/she means he didn't bring a date. Because it's hard to get a date when you've got a goatee! He also apparently he seemed like he was "in a great mood" and "relaxed."

Of course he was. Goatees relax you.

Other celebs who have gone the goatee route include Leonardo DiCaprio, Will Smith, Orlando Bloom and Brad Pitt. Absolutely none of them looked good with it.

Next up: Robert Pattinson & His Goatee Getting Married! says Life & Style.

One thing is for certain: You don't grow a goatee when you're trying to get a lady back into your life. Goatees say: I'm heartbroken! Or I'm over it! Or I'm totally diggin' being single and swingin'!

But goatees don't say, "Take me back. Let's make it like it was again." Because goatees change EVERYTHING, my friends.

Do you like a goatee on a man?


Image via Jason Merritt/Getty

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