Gwyneth Paltrow's Gift Guide Makes Oprah Look Like a Cheapskate

gwyneth paltrowWhat do Oprah Winfrey and Gwyneth Paltrow have in common? Besides being our spiritually impoverished modern day society's equivalents to mystic gurus (without the whole non-materialism thing, of course)? They both have their very own handpicked holiday gift guides! But here's the difference: Remember how, when Oprah recently announced her "favorite things" for 2013 we were able to tell you about a handful of actually affordable items? Well, we can't do that with Gwyneth's GOOP-approved list. Which isn't all that surprising, really -- I mean, even Oprah doesn't have her own personal fishmonger, as far as I know -- but a few of these "gifts" are so outrageously out of the average person's financial stratosphere we can't stop ourselves poking a little good-natured bitter envious fun. Here are a few of the most outrageously overpriced things you'll never be able to buy in Gwynnie's guide!

Purchasing info for all items can be found on GOOP.

  • Exclusive monogrammable 18kt yellow gold lana pinky ring

    1

    By Sarah Chloe for GOOP (exclusively!), this tiny trinket will set you back $1,298.00. Ho, ho, hope you have a fat bank account!

  • Bespoke pajamas

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    Image via oliviavonhalle.com

    Forget sleeping in an old t-shirt, these Olivia Von Halle "Coco Royal Blue" silk PJs monogrammed with three letters are only $1,093.50!

  • Kitchen culinary set

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    Image via MoMA

    For only $5,800.00, you too can dine using this Malle W. Trousseau 43-piece kitchen culinary set. Or you can do what I'm gonna do, which is stick with that $20 pile of IKEA silverware sitting in the dishwasher.

  • Paperclip jewelry

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    Image via hillierlondon.jpg

    I tend to think of "paperclip jewelry" as paperclips with strings attached, but about 3 letters worth of this Hillier "paperclip" jewelry costs $3,763.00.

  • Brass tea set

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    Image via tomdixon.net

    Because isn't a good cup of tea worth $830.00??

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