Angus T. Jones’ ‘Two and a Half Men’ Apology Confirms His New God Is Pretty Darn Wishy-Washy

angus t jonesOn Monday, Two and a Half Men actor Angus T. Jones appeared in a video for the Forerunner Christian Church in which he called his show "filth" and rambled on and on in non-complete sentences about how good God is, and how he's "ready to be ready," whatever that means. The so-called Church's spirtual guide has claimed that Jay-Z has a Satanic agenda, that Obama's pro-gay agenda has similarities to Hitler, and that the NYC gas crisis will make you look at your child like a "chicken wing". Mmm hmm! He says we'll all get so hungry here in the Big Apple when the food supply runs low (because that's happening soon?) that we'll start eating our babies.

Now, two and a half days after the video, Angus is backtracking. He's issued an apology ... but don't worry, he still mentions God.


In a statement to Us Weekly, Angus said:

I have been the subject of much discussion, speculation and commentary over the past 24 hours. While I cannot address everything that has been said or right every misstatement or misunderstanding, there is one thing I want to make clear. Without qualification, I am grateful to and have the highest regard and respect for all of the wonderful people on Two and Half Menwith whom I have worked and over the past ten years who have become an extension of my family ... I apologize if my remarks reflect me showing indifference to and disrespect of my colleagues and a lack of appreciation of the extraordinary opportunity of which I have been blessed. I never intended that.

Wait. Lemme get this straight. On Monday he basically said that the show is ungodly, then on Tuesday, he released a video in which he said that God is pushing him to do another season, and on Wednesday, he says he's been "blessed" with the opportunity?

This God-character of Angus's is pretty flexible. One minute He's all the show sucks balls, the next He's like, eh, what's another season for which you'll get paid $8 mil?, and finally He's all, hey, you're blessed to be on this sitcom, dude.

I can't keep up. Angus's God is very wishy-washy. My God, on the other hand, is not. In fact, He gave a statement to People that sums up this whole thing rather nicely:

"With Angus’ Hale-Bopp-like meltdown, it is radically clear to me that the show is cursed," Sheen said.

Hallelujah and amen.

What do you make of Angus's apology?

Photo via Hollywood PR/Flickr

Read More >