'True Blood' Recap: Somebody Please Beat Some Sense Into Bill Cause He SUCKS (VIDEO)

jason and sookieDear Bill Compton: I'm officially cutting you off. Until tonight's episode of True Blood, I really wanted to believe that Bill's whole "praise Lilith" shtick was just that -- a shtick. Sure, he's been doing a real good job playing along with the Sanguinistas, but any minute now he's gonna drop the zealot crap and bring down the Authority, right?!

Except APPARENTLY NOT. And even though I am a platinum card-carrying member of Team Eric, I'm STILL disgusted, Mr. Bill. DISGUSTED!

Because not only did he try to force Jessica into making Jason a vampire ...


He bitch-slapped the poor girl when she didn't do it! All because 1 human life does not equal 2 vampire lives. Or something. (And also because Bill now thinks he's the "chosen one." Which, while we're on the topic? Can Lilith please take a muthalovin' shower?! Every time that bitch appears I just want to hose her down with Neosporin and wrap her up in sanitary bandages.)

To sum up, I am done with Bill. For good this time. In happier news, seems like Eric f*cked the religion out of Nora. Woo-hoo!

I don't know, you guys. What the hell?! When will Bon Temps get back to being a harmless pit of senseless debauchery again?

Don't forget, next week is the SEASON FINALE!!!

Do you think Bill will come to his senses by the Season Finale of True Blood Season 5?


Image via HBO

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