Kristen Stewart's 'Snow White' Sequel Drama Is Manufactured Tabloid Craziness

Snow White and the HunstmanWhat an ongoing tangle of rumors this Kristen Stewart/Rupert Sanders mess is turning into. As if it's not bad enough we're being bombarded with 3,857,051 stories per day on what, exactly, Stewart and Pattinson are doing with their time post-scandal (she went to the gym! He went to a bar! OMFG I CAN'T TAKE IT WHAT WILL THEY DO NEXT, BUY GROCERIES????), there's all this craziness going on about the potential sequel to a lackluster movie -- and whether or not Kristen Stewart is still starring in it. Yes, god help me, I'm talking about Snow White and the Huntsman

Amid all the frenzied speculation over whether or not Stewart got dumped from the movie because she's a girl, while smug male Rupert Sanders remains in place as the director -- double standard! Hollywood rewarding the cheating sleazebag! MYSOGYNY! -- let me break this thing down for you so we can focus on more important matters. You know, like Miley's hair, or whatever purse Suri's carrying today.

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Okay, first of all, there's been a lot of misinformation out there. I, for one, read that Stewart's contract for the film "included sequel language," so I thought that meant she was officially tied to the film. As it turns out, Stewart herself said at a Snow White sneak preview that no one was contractually obligated to do a second movie:

We don't have to do it. That's the coolest thing. There's no pressure. But to be able to expand on this would be awesome.

So Universal can do whatever they want at this point, including scrapping the film in favor of a live-action Care Bears reboot or a comic farce starring Ashton Kutcher whose character turns into an alpaca during a full moon (working title: DUDE, WHERE'S MY WERELLAMA?). Or, as it's been rumored, they could be focusing the sequel on Chris Hemsworth's character.

The only action that's been confirmed on the maybe-sequel at this point is that David Koepp, who was hired as a screenwriter, has moved on. Probably because he's a hugely famous movie writer who'd rather be getting paid for another blockbuster film than sit around with his thumb up his ass waiting for Universal to figure out what they want to do. Meanwhile, Universal is categorically denying that they dropped Stewart from the franchise:

We are extremely proud of Snow White and the Huntsman and we're currently exploring all options to continue the franchise. Any reports that Kristen Stewart has been dropped are false.

I definitely figured the scandal meant that it was unlikely that Sanders and Stewart would team up again for the sequel (awkward x100,000), but the hysteria over the possibility of Stewart not being in the film is bizarre. It's not like we're talking about a hugely popular film that pulled in tons of great reviews, or an actress who was so integral to the storyline that it's an obvious diss not to include her in a sequel.

I mean, seriously, are we really upset over the potential of a Hunstman movie that focuses on Chris Hemsworth? NO PLEASE NOT THE HANDSOME GUY OH GOD DON'T LET HIM TAKE HIS SHIRT OFF NOOOOO.

Here's what would be worth getting fired up over: if Universal replaced Stewart with another Snow White, while keeping Sanders on board. That would be fucked. In the meantime, there's no evidence of misogyny or a studio "punishing" Stewart for her indiscretions. It's really all just tabloid craziness ... and movie business as usual.

Would you be upset if the Snow White sequel focused on the Hunstman?


Image via Universal

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