5 Ways Fiona Apple Can Make Her Super-Long Album Title Shorter

fiona appleOh, Fiona Apple. Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely a fan -- in fact, back when her first album blew up (remember "Shadowboxer"?) I think I saw her live in concert 2 or 3 times at least. Then it was like: Hey, where'd she go? Did that magician guy she was dating make her disappear or something?

Personally I blamed her rapid fade from the spotlight on the ridiculously long title of her 2nd album (usually referred to as When the Pawn ... for brevity's sake). Nobody liked it, everybody hated it, guess this Apple got worms.

So now she's back -- or, almost -- with another album, which is good news (?) except ... guess what? UBER-LONG title again:


I want to see this girl make a comeback, I really do. So I've come up with a few titles that are similar to the one she picked, but, you know, shorter. More user-friendly.

Fiona, feel free to use any of the following:

1. Idle Wheels Are the devil's workshop

2. Screw the Driver, take the Wheel

3. Whipping the Driver is easier if you tie him up with Rope first

4. The Driver Likes a Whipping with his Screw

5. Whipping that Driver gave me Rope burn

Okay, you know what?

I changed my mind. Here's what she should call her new album: Fiona Apple. Again.

Do you think Fiona Apple's new album title is too long?

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