Nicolas Cage's Naked Fudgesicle Intruder Story Is Disturbing

You may have heard about actor Nicolas Cage's troubles earlier this year, when he was arrested in New Orleans for suspicion of domestic abuse battery, disturbing the peace, and being so insanely wasted he didn't even know where he lived.

While the New Orleans arrest wasn't exactly the first incident of strange behavior from Cage in the Big Easy (I'm partial to this story of Cage staggering around a restaurant rating the female diners. "You," he reportedly said as he stumbled towards at a surely-terrified brunette, "you're a contender."), it appears he's prone to bizarre scenes in other locations as well.

As he describes it, he once had an encounter with a Fudgesicle that wasn't just out of the ordinary ... it was downright horrifying.

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While promoting his new home-invasion thriller Trespass recently, Cage confessed that he'd survived his own frightening break-in in real life:

It was two in the morning. I was living in Orange County at the time and was asleep with my wife. My 2-year-old at the time was in another room. I opened my eyes and there was a naked man wearing my leather jacket eating a Fudgesicle in front of my bed. I know it sounds funny ... but it was horrifying.

Apparently Cage was able to talk the man into leaving his home, at which point the police arrived. While Cage didn't press charges against the intruder (who was mentally ill), he could no longer live in his home after it was violated in such a rich, creamy chocolate manner.

No photos were shown of the home invader, but after a lengthy amount of research, I'm able to share this image of a similar perpetrator, pictured here in a cluster of some kind. Possibly gang-activity-related.



Okay, okay, I know. There's nothing funny about the idea of waking up at 2 a.m. to find a stranger—a naked stranger, at that—in your house, even when you consider the amusingly dry tone of this Reuters article, which clarifies that "a Fudgesicle is a frozen, ice cream-like snack." I would seriously freak out if that happened to me, and I can even imagine the desire to change homes, maybe to one with a million-dollar security system and a combination lock on the freezer.


Still, it's somehow not a surprise to hear that this happened to Nicolas Cage, of all people. After all, he's had quite the unusual history, from his epic IRS troubles, to the giant pyramid tomb he built for himself, to naming his child Kal-El. After SUPERMAN. I'm just saying, if I had to guess which Hollywood actor had a freaky run-in with a chocolate popsicle, Nic Cage would be at the top of my list. (Followed immediately by Gary Busey.)


It sounds like he's probably moved on from the traumatic incident, but now that the story has gone public, I think we should all show our support by wearing a Nicolas Cage Citizens Against Fudge-Related Home Invasion Ribbon today. Here, I think this is probably the right color:




Images via Flickr/Kirk W, Popsicle.com

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