Was Justin Bieber Kicked Off Facebook?

What? Justin Bieber, teen sensation, was kicked off Facebook? What possible reason could the social networking site have for giving the Bieber the boot? Was he posting scandalous photos? Did he use his wall as a confessional for all the illegal activity he's been hiding since he rocketed to fame? Was he harassing other Facebook users, using it as his stalking ground for unleashing his burning hatred for all other pre-pubescent stars?

What horrors have been roiling just beneath the surface of this seemingly cherubic young man with the annoying haircut? MY GOD, MY GOD, WHAT HAST FACEBOOK WROUGHT?

Oh—oh wait.

Wrong Justin Bieber.


Turns out there is—(*Yoda voice*)—another Justin Bieber. The guy who got removed from Facebook, thanks to someone accusing him of using a fake name, is a 35-year-old resident of Jacksonville, Florida.

Florida Justin is discovering that it's not much fun sharing a name with the Beebs. He gets phone calls at all hours of the day, presumably from excitable urine-spraying teenage girls, and he receives fan mail on a daily basis. Plus, Facebook kicked him out with not so much as a warning, after he'd had his account for six months.

Man, this is just tragic. Bieber Fever has claimed an innocent victim—a man who by his own account can't sing, enjoys pinball games, and just wanted to enjoy his Facebook account in peace.

There's an upside, though: people can now pronounce his name. He says,

"Before everyone said Justin Byber. I do get a lot of giggles when I swipe my card at the store. The usual response is, 'Oh you poor thing.'"

Image via JustinBieberMusic.com

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