Jill Smokler

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Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy, writes about motherhood -- the good, the bad and the scary. She's also the New York Times bestselling author Confessions of a Scary Mommy and the soon to be published Motherhood Comes Naturally (And Other Vicious Lies).


Sipping on:

Piña coladas. On the beach. ALONE.

also find Jill here:

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    You love your kid. You cherish your kid. You adore sharing your life with your kid.

    Obviously.

    But, every once in a while, you ponder what it would be like to pee in peace, eat some chocolate without sharing, or clean up after only yourself.

    You wonder ... WILL MY KID EVER FREAKING MOVE OUT?! 

    Click to find out!

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    Baby showers are one of those things that you either love like rainbows and fluffy kittens or hate with an intensity that cannot be measured. Regardless of how you feel about them, you've probably been invited to at least one, and you also probably had a few minutes of brain meltdown as you pondered the gift you should bring. Unless it's a gag gift party or you just really want to piss off the new mom, there are a few things that you should never gift at a baby shower. Things like these:

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    Congratulations, new dad!

    Are you excited to finally have the woman you married back, now that she's no longer consumed with carrying your offspring? Sorry to be the one to break it to you, but that woman is gone. Forever.

    Since you might have some trouble navigating these uncharted waters, here are some tips for surviving this new stranger called the person you chose to spend the rest of your life with ...

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    Deciding how many kids to have is one of the most important decisions you'll make in your life. Sometimes the decision is made for you -- hello, poor birth control -- but sometimes, it's one that you agonize over endlessly.

    Are you only cut out to parent one child? Would two be your perfect number? Are you meant to be a mother to three, or could you handle four or more? 

    If you've ever wondered just how many kids to have, wonder no longer. Click below to find out!

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    You vowed to love him unconditionally. To cherish him. To respect and honor him. To care for and protect him, and to comfort and encourage him. And hopefully you do, as he does you.

    But it's a good thing you didn't vow to tell him every thought that goes through your head. Because, based on these confessions, if you had, you'd probably be divorced now ...

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