Do you ever think of all the random ways people come in and out of your life? Some of the people we're most strongly bonded to are there simply because of the right circumstances, and there's just something terribly fragile about that. This is especially true when it comes to falling in love. The same guy who catches your eye one day could fly right past you another day. I've been in a relationship with the sweetest, most thoughtful, hottest, most who-raised-you-to-be-so-fantastic man ever for the past 8 months or so and I'm ridiculously happy -- but it almost didn't happen for us.
It was the Disability Day of Mourning to honor and remember disabled people killed by their parents or caregivers. Vigils were held around the country for people to gather for this purpose. I had been to last year’s vigil and decided to go again this year, but this year I was going to bring my kids. At first, the idea of taking my kids, at least one of whom is autistic, to an event where people would be talking about parents killing their autistic children seemed wildly inappropriate.
But then I thought about Jack and how he is working to figure himself out and learning about self advocacy and the fact that he is excited to hear about autistic adults. I decided that it was, in fact, a really good idea to take him.
I prepared all three of my kids for what would happen at the vigil and what they could expect.
Once you are a parent -- or, really, once you have even just conceived -- the advice starts rolling in. “Don’t leave the baby on the changing table unattended.” “Use ‘natural consequences’ to discipline your children.” “Don’t tell your child that he will go blind if he touches himself.”
Well, I could probably write a blog post about any of those, but I’m here to say that those don’t really matter. I’ll tell you what matters. I’ll tell you the one thing you need to know about parenting.
Ah, dating. Can't I just skip this whole dating thing and settle in with a nice, normal boyfriend who thinks I'm pretty and enjoys my cooking? No? I have to go through the rigmarole of getting to know guys on awkward first dates and deciding to move on or, worse (!), dealing with the unrequited crush when I'm not his cup of tequila? No? Damn.
Occassionally, a date makes a confession on a first date that crosses him off my list almost immediately. Like the time this one guy admitted that he liked to smoke pot. A lot. To each their own, I guess, but I'm pretty sure I don't want a pot-head boyfriend.
This upcoming June, I will be in my sixth wedding. Always a bridesmaid, never a ... you get the picture. And of course it's lovely when your close friends or family members get married and you get to stand up there with them while they make those incredibly important vows and you get to share in all their love and commitment and blah blah blah, but sometimes, it truly sucks to be a bridesmaid.
From the expense to the time off to having to attend all those events to paying for the dress, it seems that the duties of a bridesmaid are becoming more and more taxing every year. Whenever a friend or family member gets married, and you know you're going to get asked to be a bridesmaid, no one can blame you if a fleeting NO crosses your mind, especially since you know everything that goes into becoming one. We asked a few women why they would say no to being a bridesmaid, and here are 12 reasons why.