White Mom Sues Sperm Bank After Giving Birth to Mixed Race Baby

baby feetI belong to the school of thought that children are a gift. I have twins who are now 4 years old -- a boy and a girl -- and I am so thankful these miracles came into my life. I think all parents feel that way about their kids even when they are throwing a tantrum in the middle of the supermarket. Okay, maybe right after when the calm returns. And because of this love we have for our kids when we become parents, I am questioning why a white lesbian mom is suing the sperm bank for giving her a black man's sperm.

Jennifer Cramblett gave birth to her daughter Payton two years ago. She's healthy. She's mixed race. Jennifer and her partner Amanda Zinkon say they have racist relatives, live in an all-white town in Chicago, and fear her daughter will not be accepted because she is half black.

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I think they should move. Get themselves out of Uniontown, Illinois. And attempt to school their racist relatives. Make a change. Be the change. There is a beautiful little girl that Jennifer gave birth to thanks to the miracle of modern science. And while I understand that the couple had requested the sperm of a white man and that the Midwest Sperm Bank messed up, a flashy lawsuit with media attention will only do harm to that beautiful child later in life when she learns all about how her parents didn't want a mixed-race child. I understand the sperm bank failed at their job, but I just wish this case wasn't flashed all over the news. This has to come back to the well-being of the child. Her parents are essentially saying they don't like who their daughter is or what she is.

What's that saying? Be grateful for what you do have. This applies to so many areas in our lives. What they do have is a baby who is now a sweet 2-year-old. A healthy baby. There are so many couples who struggle to have a child.

Jennifer and her partner Amanda have already struggled with adversity since they are gay. They said that their family had a very hard time accepting them, but they came around. Just as they should accept a mixed-race child. Part of the lawsuit -- they are suing for breach of warranty and wrongful birth -- reads:

[Jennifer has a] limited cultural competency relative to African-Americans. Jennifer lives each day with fears, anxieties and uncertainty about her future and Payton's future. Payton has hair typical of an African American girl. To get a decent cut, Jennifer must travel to a black neighborhood, far from where she lives, where she is obviously different in appearance, and not overtly welcome. 

I can't help but just feel overwhelming sadness when reading about this case. There is a living, breathing child involved here. With feelings. She is the center of this case -- the reason for this case. And because this child is half African-American, the mother is suing. It's hard being a parent -- but I know, with love, she can figure this out no matter what race her child is. She can start with Payton, and teach love, and that homophobia and racism is wrong.

I really feel that if this family lives in a town that isn't accepting of other people, they should move. If this family has family members who make ignorant remarks, they should not associate with those family members anymore or work on ways to educate them. This is a life we are talking about. I wouldn't want to raise a child in a racist environment; and I don't think this family wants to either.

Of course Jennifer and Amanda say they love their daughter -- and I fully believe they do. I'm just sorry they are failing to celebrate who she is because she wouldn't be Payton, the little girl they love, if she wasn't half African American.

What do you think of this case? 

 

Image via Qi Wei Fong/Flickr

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