Children in Adult Conversations -- Yes or No?

kids in adult conversations

Photo by amaranthleewolf

Big kids feel even more grown up when they get to sit around the table chatting with their parents, aunts, uncles, and family friends. Some CafeMoms prohibit this practice and shoo their kids away to play. They don't feel that tweens or even teens should be allowed into adult conversations, partly because of the potential topics (sex, money troubles, death). They grow up too fast already, they say. Also, it's just not their place.

A conversation going on in the private group Heated Debates (over 100 comments so far) is hashing out the pros and cons of letting adolescents into adult talk circles.

"When I was younger it was a no-no, you were not allowed to sit under adults while they were talking, and you were not allowed to be part of the conversations," says guess_who_wit_6. "I am the same way. My children are not my friends nor are they my equals and they have no place in adult convos unless they are specifically asked a question."


One anonymous mom says it all depends on the conversation. She thinks it's horrible when a family is always kicking the kids out so they can talk. Kids need to feel a part of things, she says, while learning there are certain things not for their ears.

"Finances, sure. Why shouldn't they hear that? Unless of course, we are having problems. They shouldn't worry about that until they're adults," she says. "But listening to Mom and Dad talking about budgeting and compromising could be beneficial. Sex, death of someone they didn't know, legal problems ... not even teens need to hear this."



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Why or why not let big kids participate in adult conversations? What's the rule in your house?

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