Can You Force Your Kid to Go to College?

forcing kids to go to college

What do you do if you want your kid to go to college or vocational training program and she/he is refusing to go?

Two moms share their completely different takes on how they handle this situation...


2barnettkids said:

I don't believe in forcing my son to go to college if he doesn't want to go because I feel it is not productive. If he doesn't want to be there, he is not going to learn, and it will be a waste of money and his time. We started an account for each child when I got pregnant with them. We never specified that the money was only for college, so if he chooses not to go to college he is free to use the money for a car, or a down payment on a house or apartment. Because the money was saved for them, I think they should be given it. But to get the money they have to have a specific goal for spending it.

On the other hand, lawmom623 said:

My children know that they must go to college or enter some other training program that will qualify them for more than part-time work, (for example, 1-year chef's school for my oldest stepson). If they won't go to school, they need to find a way to earn a living—and fast—or they will be working 40 hours a week for me.

One of my sons had to drop out of school for a semester when he didn't apply himself. Until he found a full-time job, he cleaned my carpets, pressure-washed both the house and my husband's office building weeded flower beds, groomed dogs...the nastiest jobs I could find. I really wanted him to appreciate the fact that not having a degree or some sort of training qualified him to do work he really doesn't want to do.  He's had all As and Bs ever since he went back to school.

If he had refused to find a job and refused to work at home, he would have needed to find somewhere else to go (his father and I are divorced—he probably would have gone there).


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Have you ever been a situation like this? How did you handle it with your son or daughter?

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