Vacation With Kids More Stress Than It's Worth?

on May 19, 2009 at 7:00 AM

Vacation with the kids? Worth the trip or not?

About two-thirds of parents think going on vacation with their kids is more stressful than being at work, according to a story in U.K.-based Human Resources magazine. Almost fifty percent of parents say they don't look forward to family trips.

This certainly explains why I feel more relaxed during the week than on the weekends. Work, however stressful or busy, can be so much easier than the more chaotic nature of dealing with the boys. At work, I know I'll accomplish something, and I have a lot more control over what does or doesn't get done.

I know, for me, vacations with the kids are great if they're three days or longer. Less is usually more work than it's worth. And I do love spending time away from home as a family. We fill the days with the quality time that we don't often get within the busy-ness of everyday life.

Mostly I just had to change my mindset about vacation when I had kids. Vacations with kids are nothing like the street-strolling, window-shopping, hour-long dinner eating honeymoon we had. They're not leisurely like the trip we took to NYC before we had kids. There's also no sleeping in. But no matter, it's nice to be away from the stresses of everyday life for a little while. Even if it's chaotic. You have to love chaos a little to be a parent, don't you?

What do you think about vacations with kids? If you work outside the home, would you rather just be at work? If you have tweens or teens, do vacations with older kids get easier?

(via BusinessWeek)

About the author Sheri Reed

is a writer and the Entertainment, News & Sports editor for The Stir. She loves a good film, watches lots of good TV and follows Ryan Gosling's every move because she has to -- for work.

Filed Under: summer vacations, travel

Comments (16)

qtmomof2

on May 19, 2009 at 7:29 AM

Eh.....did you watch Table for 12 last night?? They went to Niagra Falls. I would of been very stressed if that were me LOL!!

We frequently take day trips to amuzement parks, the beach, and other places. With my 9 yr old I always get tense! I'm so worried she'll get lost. I can only enjoy myself when I know she is right with me.

With my 15 yr old step daughter ...that depends. Either she'll be really into it and keep my 9 yr old entertained and they do stuff together or she'll complain the entire time that she is bored and it's stupid. I guess we gotta catch her on her good days!

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fluud7

on May 19, 2009 at 8:44 AM

Well, I'm not sure how much help I'll be. Our kids are all under 5.

But my husband and I are taking our first vacation ever in just a week and a half! NO KIDS ALLOWED.

My parents are watching our little ones (all 3 of them!) and we are escaping to Mackinac Island for several days. I am a SAHM, so I know I will appreciate the break and my DH works two jobs, so it should be a great relaxing time for both of us!

justanotherjen

on May 19, 2009 at 9:01 AM

We've never taken an actual vacation with out kids. Just the thought gives me a migraine. Going for day trips is a big enough pain itself. We used to take weekend trips to visit family 8 hours away. At first they were nice. My sil loved taking the kids for the weekend while we relaxed. We would plan meals together with the kids but otherwise she watched them.

It's different now. None of the family has a house big enough to hold all of us (we have 4 kids). Last time we were there we got a motel room and the kids slept on the floor. They were up until midnight and woke at 6am. Everyone in the family was busy so the kids were with use 24/7. On top of that they wanted to do a family meal which meant more kids around and family ursurping my rules because they don't apply when we are there (like limited candy and soda and junk food, naps, bedtimes, etc). In the end we spent 3 days. Me and hubby had zero time alone and we did nothing but sit around and listen to the kids whine that they were bored because there was nothing to do and it was hot. I left 3 days later completely frazzled, had a migraine for days and hadn't slept more then a few hours since we got there. That was considered a vacation.

justgrape723

on May 19, 2009 at 9:34 AM

I think the problem is some families do not plan vacations that will actually fit the family. I know for us our vacations are planned around camping , racing and extended family. floating in pool

We also look for the age appropriate vacation. You can take a 4 y.o. to events where they have to sit still and be quiet all the time. We make sure we go places where the kids can (for the most part) act their age. And where there are activities for their age group.

If you want a quiet relaxing vacation leave the kids with G'ma and G'pa.

For us vacations are fun, relaxing (as in not going to work) and something we look forward to

M1ch3ll3Ann

on May 19, 2009 at 10:17 AM

Wouldn't dream of taking a vacation that did not include my son. I agree with the pp, Sounds like families are not planning vacations that fit the entire family. The best bet is vacations that allow for alot of space so everyone can spread out and relax. Camping with bicycles and water nearby, spending the day at the beach, going to a water park that has a range of slides... when it's run here and run there and everybody has to be in a group and constantly act as a group... how is that any different from home or school? I think we all just need to learn how to relax! We leave in a week and a half for CA., we've already told family we'd love a one day or night get together... but the rest of the week is ours to do with as we please. 2 other days are planned... the rest will very likely be spent lying on a beach, listening to music, reading a book, playing in the sand/water and just chilling out.

Reener

on May 19, 2009 at 10:31 AM

It depends on where you go....Beaches and lakes seem to be the best destinations for relaxing with kids IMO (camping for instance). Amusement parks, museums, and places that hold a child's interest can be nighmares.

But all I can say is try to enjoy where ever you go while your kids are small. Once they get older, they don't want to hang out with mom or dad anymore. Mine are 17 & 21-we haven't gone on vacation in over 7 years because no one can agree on where to go. That place is too boring, or there's nothing for older kids to do. So we just stay home.

Nonmember comment from Sally Black

on May 19, 2009 at 11:13 AM

Families need balance, even when it comes to vacations. The needs of every family member must be taken into account. The choice of destination must offer age appropriate activities and fun for all members of the family. Over the years I've traveled with my 3 kids when they were infants, toddlers and even as single mom with my brood. When my kids were teens we decided to all take separate vacations so that I could celebrate the unique personalities of each of my children. I wouldn't trade this one on one time for anything. As a parent, forget the stress and focus on all the wonder aspects of travel. Besides teaching kids the obvious like geography, sociology and math, it also teaches life lessons like flexibility, patience and grace. It makes children citizens of the world.

madamekatekate

on May 19, 2009 at 7:47 PM

I love taking my daughter to new places but sometimes I feel like I'm more of a babysitter in a new place than a mommy. We've only taken one big trip so far (she's only 18 months. It was around Christmas and we drove about 4-5 hours away to Asheville to visit my dad and stepmom) and it wasn't too bad...

PhillyinFrance

on May 20, 2009 at 2:48 AM

More stess that it's worth? what kind of title is this!?! yes, vacations can be stressful - its alot of change, organization, money, expectations - but not more than it is "worth"???. Chill out and enjoy the the moment. Get over the damn stress, go with the flow and learn to deal and don't sweat the small stuff. Vacations provide a learning experience for all, family time, lots of memories - even some of the bad, stressful stuff will make great memories 20 years from now! And remember, some people don't have the means to take a vacation... so remember it's no more stressful than spending day after day at home with your kids doing nothing!