Summer Family Moments

No Kids at the Wedding


There were no kids at my island wedding! We eloped.


You open the envelope and a gorgeous invitation falls out. Another wedding! But then you pause and think, "I bet this means no kids."

I'm in that situation now. My cousin is getting married this summer in the Hamptons (a beautiful Long Island, NY beach town), which is a about three hour drive from me. All my family has booked rooms at a hotel for the weekend, something I'd like to do too, but...the kids. I can totally understand wanting no children (outside of the wedding party) at a wedding; they can be distracting and definitely expensive. Really, who needs to hear wailing from the pews just before they say "I do"?

Don't get me wrong, I'm positively thrilled at the idea of a weekend getaway with my husband. I imagine myself all cute and prancing around carefree. Woohoo! Perhaps, that will really be the case. But perhaps it won't. There's a good chance I'll have no babysitter (who will keep my boys for the weekend?) and won't be going anywhere. And that's the risk any bride who invites me to her kid-free wedding faces. Maybe I'll be there. Maybe I won't.

Do you attend kid-free weddings?


activities, child care, summer vacations


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chick... chicka1313

Personally I wouldnt do. I just eloped in December. we invited no one. 'cept our witnesses and my son. I rarely go anywhere without my handful. I could understand if they werent allowed in the church, and the bride/groom have babysitters all set up, but I dont really understand why they couldnt be at the reception? Its a time to party and have a good time.

trekcass trekcass

do what my sister did, hire a friend to come with you to the wedding but to stay at the hotel as a babysitter.

MammaMcC MammaMcC

I think it is perfectly acceptable to say "no kids" at the wedding.  If the wedding is on my side of the family DH's family will watch the kids or vice versa.  Some parties are Adult only.

Cafe... Cafe Kierna

Hmmm. Not a bad idea, trekcass. Thanks.

smili... smilinghug

I think that you should go, it's always nice to get away kid free. There is always a way to find someone to watch the babies/kids for the weekend. If they are going away you would be surprised how many people with take your kids with them. I don't have family and went to Hawaii for 7 days in February. I however have dear friends and they took turns watching my 2 year old. She was fine. Had a blast! Take the opportunity to reconnect with your hubby, there is nothing wrong with that! wedding was a no kid wedding the only child at my wedding was my 3 1/2 year old neice who was the ring bearer. If someone couldn't come because they had children and were unable to find a sitter, such was life. I had a very small, but very elaborate wedding, and kids were just not appropriate.

Go have fun with your hubby!!! Dance, kick up your heals...and get down and boogy!


I didn't want kids at my wedding either...unless they were breastfed.  I used to work at a beautiful Marriott that hosted weddings every single weekend and many of them used to have one of the smaller banquet rooms *near* the wedding reception room where babysitters would watch all the kids.  We would bring them a TV and VCR, cots, blankets, food, ect..  That way, the kids are right there, but mom and dad actually get to enjoy themselves.  it was the best of both worlds. 

mom-2... mom-2-4boys

Years ago when my fil was remarried with a no-child wedding, my dh went and I stayed home with the 2 boys. Personally I thought it was a little insulting to recieve and invitation from them stating no children allowed. As a parent if you know your child is not mature enough to handle a time of having to be on perfect behavior you get a sitter on your own without being told. We did attend a wedding a few hours out of town knowing the boys couldn't handle the long ceremony, so we brought my mom to stay with the boys. Before and after the wedding was like a mini vacation,but dh and I had a night to enjoy w/o kids. (The 2nd wedding was for everyone, so that was why I attended.)

sll1976 sll1976

I've never been invited to one, honestly, but DF and I may have one.  I will say that we are hoping to have someone watch them in the daycare at church so the parents won't have to worry about finding a sitter.  It will just be for the actual ceremony and then children will be welcome at the reception.

teamq... teamquinn

I had one wedding where the kids were welcome at the wedding but not at the reception.  I am assuming it was the cost, since it was a fancy sit down affair.  We hired a sitter for our wedding and the church has a cry room right off the sanctuary where babies can be taken, there is a speaker so the moms can hear and one way glass so they can see out.  I also printed coloring pages off the net and bought a bunch of small crayon sets for any kid guests. 

I would I attend a no kids wedding, it would really depend on the person who was getting married, but probably not. 

Avarah Avarah

I had 16 children from 6 months to 11 years old at my wedding.  I paid for children's plates for them and for a babysitter to be in a smaller conference room off the ballroom with napmats and games and a tv and some movies. 

As much as I think that people have the right to host the party they choose to host, I don't really understand why people don't want kids there.  Marriage is about joining two families and kids are part of families. Crying kids are a part of nature and don't "detract" from the solemness or importance of the event.  Who cares if people are looking at a cute kid or at the bride? It's not a fashion shoot, it's a celebration!

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