My Son Is Being Teased About His Long Hair, But I Don't Want Him to Cut It

blond long hair boy

The other day, my 4-year-old son Hunter came home from school and asked for a really short haircut.

"Like this, Mom," he said piling up all his golden locks on top of his head. "Short."

"Like Cruz's hair?" I asked. (Cruz is one of his friends who has an adorable super short haircut.)

"Yeah. Like Cruz."

I was surprised. Hunter has never liked getting his hair cut -- he's even told me that scissors "hurt" his hair. So aside from a trim by mom here and there, he's only had one professional haircut. That was at what we called "Rock Star Haircuts" by a cool guy name Gunther who had tattoos. Hunter loved that their names sounded similar, and was happy that Gunther just trimmed it, fixing the uneven ends made by Mommy.


My son told me that when he was on the playground, "Those girls thought I was a girl." The girls were around 6 or 7 years old. It's not clear what they said or how they said it -- it could have been very innocent. But to an almost 5, sensitive, blond, long-haired boy, it was crushing.

Adults, too, mistake him for a girl sometimes. We were apple picking recently and the woman at the farm said something along the lines of "The girls can also pick from these bins." Hunter's feelings were clearly hurt so I politely corrected her. Then I thought that made me sound like a jerk. But in my son's eyes, I stood up for him and that was what was important.

At school, some boys called Hunter a girl. He said they were mean to him and didn't listen when he told them he was a boy. Again, I'm not certain of the details, but what I do know is that suddenly, the boy who never liked getting his hair cut, wanted very short hair.

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I reminded him that Captain Jack Sparrow had long hair. I showed him pictures of Johnny Depp, Brad Pitt, Dave Grohl, Christian Bale, Ashton Kutcher, Jared Leto, and a whole slew of male models all with long hair. (It was a highlight of my day.) Hunter said, "Boys have long hair, too. Not just you, Mommy." I told him that girls have short hair, too, sometimes. Like MeMa (his grandmother) does. "Yeah, boys and girls can have long and short hair." They sure can, I told him.

I let the subject rest. 

Then one night, just after his nighttime shower, I was brushing his hair, marveling at his beautiful blond ringlet curls, and he said, "Mom, I like my long hair. I don't want to cut it."

I told him I'd love him no matter what his hair looks like. But I'm proud that my son is remaining true to himself.

What do you think of boys with long hair?


Image via Michele Zipp

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