6 Things Kids Always Misplace -- No Matter What​

Scotch tapeI recently needed to wrap a present, and as I was digging through the junk drawer for the Scotch tape, I remembered: Oh yeah, I have children. Therefore, the tape isn't in the drawer. It isn't on my desk or in the kids' crafting supplies or anywhere that makes any kind of sense. Fifteen increasingly frustrating minutes later, I found the tape abandoned on the base of my 6-year-old's bedroom lamp next to a random assortment of seashells, a LEGO vehicle of some kind, and a homemade hatchet.

In my experience, once you give birth, certain things are never where they're supposed to be. (And I'm not just talking about my hooters, although frankly I wish I'd been warned I'd eventually need a spatula to get a sports bra on.) I've been photo-documenting this irritating phenomenon and I'd like to share my findings with you, so you can tell me: is it just me? Am I the only one whose children are part magpie? Should I just give up on having easily accessible wrapping tape EVER AGAIN??

For instance, the calculator. It SHOULD be: on my husband's office desk, which is next to my desk. Instead, here's where I found it the other day:


The stapler. SHOULD be: on the same desk. Is ACTUALLY: squirreled away in the 8-year-old's bookshelf.

Couch pillows. SHOULD be: on the dang couch. Are frequently located: ANYWHERE ELSE, like for instance piled in the corner next to the TV because "We were making a nest!"

More from The Stir5 Things I Don't Understand About My Son's Messy Bedroom

My absolute favorite pen, the one I'm super-anal about and have informed the children they're not allowed to borrow. SHOULD be: in my pen holder. Is ACTUALLY: dumped in their crayon box, usually -- arrrgh, rrrrrrrrrrrggggggghhh -- without its lid.

Oh hey, there's the hole punch too. I WAS TOTALLY LOOKING FOR THAT LAST WEEK.


The grownup scissors. SHOULD be: stuck in the knife block in the kitchen. Is actually: thrown in a random toy box because of course. OF COURSE.

Fine. FINE. Forget it. I don't need to, like, be able to find things in my own house. I give up. In fact ...

Do you have this should-be-there, is-actually-somewhere-dumb problem in your home too?

Images via © istock.com/pagadesign; Linda Sharps



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nonmember avatar needsmorecoffee

We probably own 20 rolls of tape, but I can never find any and buy more on a regular basis.
Also chapstick. Why do they always steal my chapstick?!?!

Keya25 Keya25

Scissors will never remain in the junk drawer. I think they disappear and pop up in random places in the house. On their own.

Why am I finding markers in the FIRDGE??? This has happened more than once. Also other things like toy cars, freaking legos and markers. Behind the orange juice.

Pillows aren't for the couch silly. They are the walls of the fort and or castle. Duh.

antfa... antfarmer101

Oh god. Everything. EVERYTHING. Between the two little kids, and the one big giant grownup kid (husband) and THE DOG in my house, nothing is EVER where it is supposed to be. There is a constand litany of "Where is the, who took the, do you know where...". I agree Linda... arrrgggggghhh!!!

nonmember avatar Dana

So glad to know I'm not alone!! I am constantly irritated all day by this crap, it seems all I do is scream and yell and punish my 4 boys. Thanks so much for this article, I think that the next time I find the milk sitting on the couch or the Xbox games scattered in the bathroom, I am going to take a deep breath and maybe lay off them a little bit .. and not stress out so much myself. Kids will be kids.

nonmember avatar Amber

This morning I could not find my daughter's shoes. I looked everywhere until she finally remembered: "Oh yeah! I left them outside!" Where outside? In the neighbor's ding dang driveway, that's where. Along with eight large rocks and a piece of the neighbor's iron gate. My neighbors ADORE us!

Cryst... CrystalYaris

Yep. I have been blaming my garden gnomes but the gnomes came along when my bouncing baby boy was starting to walk.

LadyH... LadyHutch0824

the scissors...THE SCISSORS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


That is the one that pisses me off the most!


Loved the last picture...my fucks are also completely gone.

nonmember avatar ago

Omw that is so our house! My kids can't stand for pillows to be on the couch. Seems like that's the first thing they do in the morning and as soon as I put them back, they're back on the floor. It drives me crazy!

justi... justinnaimee

I found scissors on the staircase today. Wtf?

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