16 Grossest Things Parents Do for Their Kids

Jeanne Sager | Nov 4, 2013 Being a Mom
16 Grossest Things Parents Do for Their Kids

kid picking his nose
You don't have to be a parent very long to realize the universal truth of kids: they're gross. They burp and fart with reckless abandon, and they've never heard a potty joke that did not leave them on the floor in stitches. But parents, let's be honest with ourselves for a second, shall we? We're pretty gross too. At least, we parents do some pretty disgusting things for the sake of our kids.

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Yes, all parents, even the faint of heart, have found themselves helping covered in pee or poop a time or two (and sometimes both). You are not alone!

And to prove it, we here at CafeMom asked parents to 'fess up to some of the most disgusting things they've done for their kids.

Think you can top number 11? What's the most disgusting thing you've done for your kids?

most disgusting parts of motherhood 

Images via Oliver Rossi/Corbis and Ned Frisk Photography/Corbis

  • Wiped a Poopy Hiney


    Image via Corinne Malet/PhotoAlto/Corbis

    Changing a baby's poopy diaper is hard. Chasing a freshly potty-trained toddler and trying to wipe their poopy behind may be even harder. Scrub those hands, Mom!!

  • Caught Vomit


    Image via Image Source/Corbis

    When I asked a group of parents what the most disgusting thing they'd ever done for a child was, not one, not two, not three, but FOUR weighed in that they'd been known to put their hands out to catch a child's vomit to keep it from getting all over said child.

    Way to take one for the team!

  • Fished a Toy From the Toilet


    Image via KidStock/Blend Images/Corbis

    It's all fun and games until the kid drops their beloved toy into the toilet. And guess who gets to fish it out?

    More From CafeMom: Quiz: Are You a Boy Mom or a Girl Mom?

  • Let My Daughter Wipe Messy Hands On Me


    Image via Susanne Dittrich/Corbis

    If you've ever looked at a mom and noticed the bottom half of her jeans is covered in handprints, allow me to explain: children love to come running up to Mom and say, "Moooooom, my hands are covered in [insert gross thing here]. What do I do?" They are most prone to do this right after you've used the last wipe in your purse on their sister.

  • Licked a Dirty Pacifier


    Image via Robert Recker/Corbis

    Here's how the story goes: Child throws pacifier. Pacifier lands in dirt. Child cries for pacifier. Mom licks pacifier and hands it back to child. Child is once again content. The end.

  • Sucked Snot Out of a Sick Child's Nose


    Image via Stella/fstop/Corbis

    Those aspirator bulbs are great, but you know what happens when they don't work, right?

  • Helped Get the Poop Out


    Image via Misty Bedwell/Design Pics/Corbis

    When your child screams, "Moooooom" from the bathroom, and the scent of fresh feces is heavy in the air, the best answer may be "she moved to Argentina." Otherwise, you may just find yourself helping a constipated child, ahem, evacuate those bowels.

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  • Cleaned Dead Critters From Your Laundry


    Image via Randy Faris/Corbis

    You know what happens when curious youngsters play outside in the creek and come home with frogs and crickets in their pockets? They tend to forget about them, until they hear Mom shriek out loud as she starts emptying those pockets to load the clothes in the laundry.

  • Went Up His Nose to Rescue a Toy


    Image via Sebastian Pfuetze/Corbis

    WHY do children insist on shoving things up their noses? WHY?

  • Chewed on Baby Toenails


    Image via Creasource/Corbis

    I would never imagine chewing on my own toenails. But when your baby is itty bitty, the thought of putting sharp clippers near their squirming feet is terrifying.

  • Taken a Sniff of Baby's Diaper


    Image via George Shelley/CORBIS

    Sometimes the best way to tell if the baby's got a poopy diaper is to just lean over and take a whiff!

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  • Scooped Poop Out of the Tub


    Image via Holger Winkler/A.B./Corbis

    No, that's not a small brown bath toy.

  • Accepted His Booger


    Image via Oliver Rossi/Corbis

    "Here, Mom!" may be the two scariest words in the English language. You just never know what they're handing you. Sometimes it's a present. More often it's a booger. Which you end up accepting because, well, at least they won't wipe it under the dining room table.

  • Admired His Poop


    Image via David P. Hall/Corbis

    Have you ever had a child scream for you to come into the bathroom, only for you to arrive and find out they really want you to check out their ginormous poop? Yeah, me neither. But it totally happened to someone I know.

  • Two Words: Head Lice


    Image via Ian Hooton/Science Photo Library/Corbis

  • Helped Her Pee in the Woods


    Image via Poppy Berry/Corbis

    Sometimes a child just HAS to go to the bathroom, and there is no waiting until you can find a rest stop to pull over. With boys, this is generally pretty easy. With daughters, however, you find that you are probably going to get some pee on you.

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