It's been a few weeks since school got started and we're all still getting into the swing of things. As anxious as I was to get into a routine again, September always holds a few bumps as we work out the kinks of a new school year. Curious to see what other moms thought of this time of year, I perused my Confessional. As always, it was enlightening. If you ever wondered what moms really think of the start of the school year, read on ...
1. All of the moms standing next to me at the bus stop the first day had tears in their eyes. I had joy. Pure joy.
2. My kid forgot underwear on the first day of school. First grade? Don't have a great feeling about you.
3. The school year has begun. The fact that my kids didn't do a single educational thing this summer is about to become abundantly clear.
4. Brought a flask of vodka to back to school night. Made it much more tolerable.
5. I'm actually sad the kids are gone all day. Makes it more obvious how empty my days are without them.
6. Went school shopping in the mall with my son, 15. We split up and he met me later coming out of Spencer's. Asked what I bought there and I could not tell. Very awkward silence on the way home. Sorry son, moms need toys too.
7. Told my parents I was too broke to buy the kids new school clothes and they sent me $500. Bought the kids $200 worth at thrift stores and spent the rest on new makeup for me.
8. Pretty sure I forgot how to assemble school lunches over the summer. WTF, brain?
9. My kids are back in school. All is right with the world.
10. What I'm most excited about now that the kids are in school? Picking back up Fifty Shades and my dildo mid-day. Oh, Christian, how I've missed you.
Image via Scary Mommy