My 8-Year-Old Daughter Still Sees Her Dad Naked

naked feetYou know that look you get when you say something you thought was pretty normal, only they think you're bonkers? I got one of those looks recently. I had mentioned being embarrassed when my daughter threw open the bathroom door when we had company because she's so used to it being open.

When it's just the family at home, most doors are open in my house. It doesn't matter who is behind them or who is naked. My daughter has seen me naked. She has seen my husband naked.

Hold on, before you freak out, let me explain!

I wouldn't call us nudists. For the most part, everyone in the house is wearing their clothes pretty much all the time. The most "undressed" we get on a regular basis is sitting in shorts and a tank top (for me) or just a pair of shorts (my husband) on a hot summer's day. 

We don't get naked around our child on purpose.

But there are those moments when someone gets into the shower or out of the shower when you're completely naked and the child walks in, and you have to make a decision. Do I freak out? Do I grab wildly for the towel or t-shirt, making a big show of the fact that, OMG, I'm not wearing any clothes?

We don't.

We don't make a big deal out of being naked around our daughter. I don't and neither does my husband.

We don't want to draw attention to the fact that we're naked, but even more than that, we don't want it to seem scary or uncomfortable. We don't want her to think that bodies are "gross."

That's the message we send kids when we make a big deal out of being naked, isn't it? That there is something dirty about our bodies? Something secret?

I don't want my daughter to think bodies are dirty.

Secret? Well, we do make sure she's covered up in public, and we've had long, long talks about the right to say no and why private parts are "private."

But I grew up in a buttoned up household, where no one was ever naked. I also grew up with an eating disorder and to this day am extremely uncomfortable with my body. Even sitting in my own home, wearing clothes, I often move a blanket or a pillow onto my lap to add coverage, to help make myself disappear.

My husband and I don't want our daughter to feel that way, to feel that her body is something she needs to cover up even in the comfort of our own home.

This is why we've made nudity a non-issue.

We don't flaunt it. But we don't freak out over it either. If it happens, it happens, and we just go with the flow.

More From The Stir: My 8-Year-Old Daughter Uses the Public Men's Room to Pee

All over the Internet, there are sites where parents ask "when are kids too old to see their parents naked." The answers vary. Some parents never let it happen (seriously, the moms didn't even breastfeed). Some parents stop when a child can use anatomical language. Still others are still naked around their adult kids (THOSE I would call nudists).

I have read them all, and each time, I've come back to this: I'm raising a kid who is never afraid to tell me how she feels ... about anything. And she's never told me that it's wrong for her parents to be naked in her presence.

So how about you? Do your kids still see their parents naked?

 

Image by Jeanne Sager

 

 

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bills... billsfan1104

I think that 8 is a little old to her dad naked, and it's not about thinking bodies are gross either.

bills... billsfan1104

And you are brave for posting this.

crick... cricketmk3

These parents are raising a child who wil probably show too much of her body in public and not be ashamed...and get herself into some real trouble one day.

Kings... KingsleysMommy

I saw my mother naked my whole life and my father till I was about 10. They believed the same way you do and I have never been uncomfortable with myself physically. @cricket...I, nor any of my 3 sisters, ever showed too much of our bodies in public. None of us have gotten into "big trouble". And we all have a very healthy self image. I fully believe the reason behind this is because nudity was no big deal in our house. And we all had a very close and open relationship with our mother until she passed away. But to each his own. I think that whatever works for you is best for your family. :-)

britt... brittneyleigh88

It's a couple of seconds of breasts/ genitalia. If this scars your kid for life, they will have way bigger issues than this in their lifetime.

jalaz77 jalaz77

My hubby walks around in his boxers all the time, in between changing clothes from a run, lawn work, work clothes...that is not naked. My kids walk in my bathroom while I am showering, when I get out of the shower, changing...I am naked and have told the kids countless times, knock before entering cause everyone deserves privacy. I am not teaching my kids that their bodies are dirty but that it's their body and only certain people can/need to see them naked. Misleading title.

Simon... SimonzKedge

Kids will let you know if/when they're uncomfortable with nudity. People are acting like the whole family are just walking around naked 24/7. Seriously, being nonchalent is a much better reaction than screaming and freaking out. Geesh.

nonmember avatar Lovemommyhood

Totally normal. As long as I lived with my parents I still saw my dad naked now and then. From before I was born he slept naked, and went to and from the shower naked. He was always in a hurry and not like he wanted to get caught, it was just his routines. He'd always hustle out of sight when he saw me but no one ever freaked out or cared. I was prob 17-18 the last time I saw him streaking it..... When its always been that way you just shake your head and move on not giving it a second thought.

abra819 abra819

Egh....no thank you, way to old.

IKnow... IKnow0101

I have a 3 and 5 year old and I'm lucky if I am able to go to bathroom by myself let alone able to change clothes without them sitting on the edge of the bed.  It should only become uncomfortable if the child is starting to feel embarrassed.  Since I have a boy I do keep a towel or bathrobe around me while I get dress or make sure to turn around but I doubt I will get any privacy anytime soon.

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