9 Embarrassing Family Secrets Kids Reveal at School

If you take a car ride with either of my daughters you will certainly know my life story by the end of it and probably my mother's and grandmother's as well. I've got two over-sharers and while it can be charming it can also be awkward. Especially when things I'd rather not broadcast end up illuminated in art projects or included in their classroom journals.

I recently spotted a journal entry illustrating the "castle" we live in (not true), the time I took them on a late-night ice cream run in their pajamas (OK, once) and a rendering of the four of us sleeping in the same bed like a pile of monkeys. If only I could have added a footnote: "Actually, this rarely happens because if both girls come in our room in the middle of the night, I'll head back into one of their beds. Best sleep ever!"

From an entirely informal survey of parents' in the same boat, here are the 9 topics of revelation that sting the most.

  1. Evidence of Affluence (real or imagined). Drawings of large country houses with pools, hot tubs, huge backyards, tennis courts, Ferraris and helipads.
  2. Broken promises (real or imagined). Pets you'd said you'd get, toys you'd said you'd buy, that little brother they're still waiting for.
  3. Gross habits of dad. Smelly socks. Snoring.
  4. Ever-present Electronics. There's nothing like a family portrait where everyone's either slumped in front of a TV, playing Wii, holding a iPad or all of the above. 
  5. Family routines (real or imagined). When a friend's daughter was asked to draw what they do on weekends she had dad cooking and mom napping. 
  6. Any kind of booze. Wine. Beer. But usually wine.
  7. Family dynamics. When describing her family a friend's kid wrote that she was more like her dad but her sister "has a bad temper like mommy."
  8. Big Birthdays. Sometimes you were hoping to keep certain milestones under the radar.
  9. Dark thoughts on siblings. Sharing a room. Toys that got mysteriously destroyed. Flat out jealousy. It may seem peachy on the surface but when kids reveal their true feelings, it can get ugly.

Has your kid ever revealed something you wish they hadn't at school?

Image via Moominmolly/Flickr

behavior, elementary school


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SuzyB... SuzyBarno

Mine are not school aged yet but my cousins son once told his teacher that his parents just decide who had the least to drink at a party and that's who drives home. Lol!

nonmember avatar Jellyca

Lol SuzyBarno!! I once was babysitting for my friend's neighbor who said very loudly in front of the whole store that her mommy threw a plate at her daddy and missed. Terrible at first but evenutally hilarious.

Graca... Gracalynsmom

Mine wasn't a picture. But at my daughter's school ** 3 th Grade** they were having a  program about the dangers of drinking and driving and effects of  bad driving. Well at the end of it, My little one pipes up and said.. officer my mom Drink's and drives and she is on her phone while driving and we are in the car when she does it!  After they further questioned her, It became apparent that I drink soda and have a ear piece.

daydr... daydreamer6170

when I was little I was spinning in a corner and my mom said " stop f***ing around before u get hurt" two seconds later I fell and badhed my face on the molding of the wall. at the hospital I told the dr" mommy said to stop fing atound and I didnt so now I need stiches" my poor mother almost had cps called lol

nonmember avatar NoWay

When my two boys were little (around 2 and 3) we were in a very busy public bathroom so we were all in one stall together. They both went potty and I figured I would go, too, while we were there. Well, my oldest decided to announce very loudly "Oh! You had to go poop, too!" I will admit that it was funny, though slightly embarassing, when the lady in the next stall started to giggle. :)

nonmember avatar melmcl

We went to a middle school choir concert and it was my husbands first. I told him, there will be a small child who says something inappropriate during a quiet time and do not laugh. Sure enough, halfway through the lady in front of us with her 2 little guys (maybe 3 & 4) said "Mom I have to poop!" really loud during a quiet part. To his credit, he didn't laugh, but we were all trying our hardest not to even the mom.

Deweymom Deweymom

My 4yo daughter told her preschool teacher that her daddy is buying her a pony if she keeps her pull-up dry at night.

No mention that it's actually a MY LITTLE pony from build a bear.

worki... workingmama86

Oh my daughter makes sure to tell everyone she knows every little detail about our lives. LOL. It's quite amusing when people come up to me and ask me if I'm pregnant or what not.... She has a big imagination and loves to talk! 

Katriena Young

We were watching my 3 year old cousin eailer this week when we had a guy come in and work on our toliet. She watched him for a momeant then followed me back to the kitchen. She was asking why the guy was there. When I said that the toliet was broken she looked at me with a look of knowledge on her face and said, "Oh. So the toliet is broken. You need to hump it to fix it." I looked at her and tried to hold in my laughter. I couldn't do it. I lost it.
She lives with her grandparents, my aunt and uncle, and her grandpa is a plumber. I asked her if Papa uses the plunger on the toliet to unplug it. And she said yes, when Uncle Cameron does something to it.

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