I've heard of divorcing parents pulling some pretty crazy custody battle stunts, but none so crazy as what one dad in recently (allegedly) did to mess with his ex-wife. Apparently, both 37-year-old Chad M. Holm and his ex "used methamphetamine together" for years while they were married. After they broke up, the couple's 5 and 7-year-old children were temporarily placed with Holm while their mother underwent voluntary drug treatment (whether Holm stopped using drugs or not is unclear). Either way, the mom had reportedly been clean for a year in September, so she was pretty shocked when she failed a drug test ... until she remembered the "unappetizing cookies" her kids baked several days earlier at their father's house.
Naturally they brought some samples home and begged her to take a bite of a cookie, so she did (we've all been there, yuck) but couldn't even finish the cookie because it "tasted terrible." And not "the children must have mixed up the sugar and the salt" terrible -- more like "these cookies are laced with meth" terrible. She claims her ex-husband tried to sabotage her drug test before an upcoming child custody trial, a pretty horrible thing to do -- but that's not even the worst part. The WORST part is that the couple's kids also tested positive for meth. Nice one, dad.
Holm denies everything (the cookies tested positive too, by the way) and charges have yet to be filed, but this story is still a perfect way to illustrate what I consider to be the BIGGEST mistake any divorced/divorcing couple can make: Lashing out at each other without considering the kids. Isn't it obvious they're always the ones who end up getting hurt? Or, in other words, isn't it obvious the kids are going to end up eating those meth-laced cookies, too?
As a divorced parent, the last thing I would ever do is intentionally try to hurt my ex or badmouth him in front of my kids (and vice versa). Maybe -- probably -- it's because I have firsthand knowledge of how much it sucks to be the kid stuck in the middle of a battle that ultimately has nothing to do with you, personally, but somehow you've been drafted as a pawn anyway.
It's a miserable, damaging experience even if (in most cases) you can't test for proof in a lab. Which is why, no matter how hard it is, parents absolutely HAVE to suck it up and be as civil as possible to each other. Don't let your kids eat the meth cookies.
Do you know any divorced parents who do crazy things to get back at each other?
Image via D. Sharon Pruitt/Flickr