There Are Some Lyrics a Kid Should Just Never, Ever Sing

Mom Moment 32

Kids, lyricsI’m getting ready to show my age here, but when I was a kid (the key phrase that indicates someone is indeed about to launch into a story that will show their age), I used to rap the molasses outta the lyrics to “Push It.” I loved Salt-n-Pepa anyway, down to my ripped jeans and my replica of their asymmetrical haircuts. I don’t know about them, but mine took a regrettable and absurd amount of time to grow out.

So that combo, the fan-dom and the haircut, made me the fourth member of the group in my mind whenever that song came on. Perhaps Salt-Pepa-n-Curry? Or was I more of a Paprika? Either way, I obliviously ooh-baby-baby-edsong  and emphatically ahhh-pushed-it in front of my mama whenever it came on. She never said a word to encourage or put me on ice either way.

Mind you, I wasn’t allowed to say “fart,” “boobs,” or “shut up” (substituted by “break wind,” “breasts,” and the much less saucy “be quiet”) but she let me say “Ah, push it, push it real good” and turned a blind eye to me heaving my yet-undeveloped hips out to dry hump the air. I mean, by Nicki Minaj standards, that’s a freakin’ nursery rhyme. But still.

More from The Stir: Laughing at Your Cursing Kid Doesn't Make You a Bad Mom

Fast forward to the present-time, when I have my own daughter and this generation of sexually charged songs is much less subtle and bypass suggestion for in-your-face boldness. As a music lover, you might just want to sing along and do a little sashay to the beat. But as a mother, you have to be all responsible and stuff, and that means not letting your babies belt out smutty lyrics.

When I heard Girl Child singing along to “S&M,” I could’ve cut a hole in the floor, burrowed into the ground, and swallowed a wad of hell. I don’t do much forbidding in the arts department, but I blacklisted that sucker. Same with Britney Spears’ “If You Seek Amy” (sound it out with me…eff-yoo-see-kay-me…yeah, that’s right). Yamma.

But the ultimate, also another Rihanna ditty, was “Rude Boy,” because you just haven’t keeled over and died inside until you’ve heard the lilting soprano of your otherwise innocent 10-year-old singing a very not-so-innocent, “Come here, rude boy, boy/can you get it up? Come here rude boy, boy/is you big enough?”

It’s still enough to make me cringe. Shudder.

Are there any songs you just absolutely forbid your kids to listen to?

Image via davitydave/Flickr

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Roxygurl Roxygurl

And reasons like that are why we only listen to country. Sure it can get raunchy from time to time but nothing like the crap I hear on the other stations

Alexa... AlexaAdams

Yeah a TON of songs I don't let my daughter listen too. It's ridiculous some of the songs on radio stations.

linzemae linzemae

I recently bought an old tlc album and realized how dirty all the songs were! I cant believe I listened to that when I was little. Granted I didnt know what the songs meant

Bianca Long

im so glad my kids dont speak english (yet) so i can listen to any music i like and dont have to worry about their "innocent" little ears :D
and if they do repeat a lyric that would be considered inappropriate in the US, nocody in germany  gives a crap. (example, P!nks "f*cking perfect* is one of my 5 year old sons favorite songs, but since it's played uncensored on the radio here, nobody would bat an eyelash if they heard him sing it)

Todd Vrancic

Really listen to some of the lyrics of rock songs from the '60s.  They will surprise you.  Try "Lola", for example.

daisy... daisysrdeadly

I don't worry about it too much. My 6 year old doesn't understand the lyrics yet and by the time they do they will just do it when you are not around anyway. I listen to some of the music I listen to when I wasn't around my parents, when I was a teen and think ugg wow. Sometimes though I will hear her singing along though and think well that doesn't need to happen again. I don't know which songs specifically though cause I hear it once and than avoid it if I hear it again.

I do remember my mom telling me no Rob Zombie once and I brought up the song Cocaine and Mas Tequila as well as others that I grew up listening too. I realize I heard a lot of edgy songs growing up and I am perfectly fine none of it scarred me and as mentioned I didn't even get it until I was much older. So I see it as no harm done.

PonyC... PonyChaser

You know, Todd, my ex made that same comparison to me when we were "discussing" whether our 9-year old should be allowed to listen to S&M. His argument was that it's better that we expose him to everything because to "ban" something would only make it more attractive. He used himself as an example: his VERY Catholic and very conservative mother got the vapors at the mere *thought* of Black Sabbath, so, as a 13-year old, he blasted it in his room every chance he got. He did it for the shock value, and because his mother never set him down and told him just *why* the lyrics of whatever song she hated were inappropriate. She just screwed up her nose and said, "Forbidden". Fuel to the fire, if you ask me.

I do not like S&M, and several other songs. When I'm in control of the radio, we don't listen to "that station". When an inappropriate song comes on, I tell him WHY he can't listen to it, and WHY I don't want to hear those lyrics coming out of his mouth (degrading, foul, etc). He understands that I don't listen to it because it offends me, and why (and sometimes it's something as tame as Taylor Swift, or even Mozart - because I find nothing musically appealing about it)

I can't control what he listens to in public, but I sure can give him a base on which to build.


Rootbear Rootbear

My step kids mother lets her listen to slutty pop music, of which she knows all the words. Nothi g weirder than driving with my boyfriend and hearing a 5 year old sing about whips and chains excite her.....not surprising though considering her mother ALSO lets this kid watch The Rocky Horror Picture Show, and when told that its inappropriate her response was 'ill NEVER say no to my child'. Fun battle this is.

2cent... 2centsCDN

Awww memories. Love me some Salt n Pepa (supersonic.). I'm sure I gave my Mom a few grey hairs belting out Madonna's Like a Virgin when I was 10. LOL

I've drawn the line at the Whistle Song and change the radio station every time it comes on. It just gives me the creeps to hear my 12 year old daughter whistling along.

tuffy... tuffymama

Oh Lawd, Rootbear. You have a long row to hoe with that clown. I wish you the best. Phew!

I have had to ban all Rihanna, even for myself. I just can't let my LO listen to that. Her questionable personal judgment just compounds the issue; when I hear her raunchy lyrics, I think of those manchild fists slamming into her beautiful face, and know that she took that creep back into her heart and bed. No, I won't condone that and play along.

When my oldest was small, I actually had to have it written into the court papers that he wasn't allowed to listen to Lords of Acid or watch any movie with a stricter rating than PG. LOA is not the kind of lyrics you'd want your babyfaced cherub chanting, trust me. And XH was so loose about exposing ODS to all manner of horrible people and unwholesome media. XH even let his other kids watch the Saw movies. The youngest was a toddler! That really freaked me out!

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