Growing Families

6 Things Not to Say to a Mom With 'Lots' of Kids

LOL 232

6 annoying things people say to big families

I wish I could say I was surprised at the stupid things people say to parents, but I'm not. Since having my first child almost 9 years ago, I've learned that parenting is something that everyone, even people who don't have kids, have an opinion about.

Whatever happened to "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all"?

The comments I thought were bad when I had one kid are about 400 times worse now that I have four kids. But today, instead of smiling and laughing like I usually do since I usually have my kids with me when I hear this crap, I'm going to share the craziest things people have said to me and what I'd love to tell them. Or where to shove it.

  1. You do know where babies come from, right? You know, it's funny you mention that because I was just asking myself the other day "Where do babies come from?" and then my vagina piped up and reminded me of the combined 30 hours of labor and all those stitches.
  2. Wow, you really have your hands full! Are you kidding? This is a spa vacation. See, I actually have about 20 more children at home but I keep them all locked in a closet and rotate out the good ones.
  3. You must have a lot of sex. Well, don't tell anyone, but I actually bought these kids on the black market. But yes, I have sex. A lot. Probably a lot more than you do, especially if you say stupid crap like that all the time. 
  4. You are my hero. Oh gosh, thank you. My vagina is blushing.
  5. I'm so glad I stopped at two kids. If you think it's okay to say something like that in public to a mom, in front of her children, I'm really glad you stopped too.
  6. You must like torture. Wait a second. This is so bizarre. Have you been looking into my bedroom?

See also:

8 Things Never to Say to a Mom of an Only Child

5 Things Never to Say to an Adoptive Parent

8 Things Never to Say to Moms of Multiples

5 Things Never to Say to Lesbian Moms

20 Things You Should Never Say to a Pregnant Woman

5 Things Not to Say to Divorced Moms


Moms of 3 or more kids, what comments drive you crazy?


Image via Kristen Chase

siblings, family


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Jespren Jespren

I like responding to #1 with "yes, and apparently we're very good at it"


OMG Eliza! You're asked that? I think that there is so much over sharing on these talk shows that people truly have lost all sense of boundaries, they think its the norm. Boundaries people,boundaries and filter.

Amand... Amanda0712

My husband and I have 5 children. When we are out with all of them, we do get sarcastic remarks. Most of the time, my husband just says, "we don't watch much tv obviously!" That usually shuts people up. Lol

nonmember avatar Saoirse

Amazing how forward people are now. I have 3 boys, all grown up, and was was young. Nonetheless, the boys and I were always receiving compliments on how well behaved they were, and how steong I was for the single mom thing. The most frequent comment was "I don't know how you do it" response always was "you just do!" The boys turned out great! Navy and college : ). So glad no one ever disrespected us like some of these comments.

truth... truthrowan

I've been asked if all my identical looking kids are both mine and my husbands (No, we aren't a blended family, all four of our kids are ours together, married 8 years), or how many "different dads" do my kids have. Hate that one. I've got 4. Conversely, I asked a mom of 8 the other day in the grocery store what they drive, since our van is only a 7 seater. She has a 12 passanger van. 

2nino... 2ninos4me

Lmaooo at #3

Flori... Floridamom96

Pinkmani, I am the second oldest of seven children fortunate enough to have some of the best parents EVER. We were so very loved growing up that it was only upon entering adulthood that I realized how few material things we had when I was little. My mother stayed home and raised us, for which I am eternally thankful. I had plenty of one on one time with both my parents, lots of support from them for my athletic and academic pursuits, not to mention built in playmates. I also grew up extremely close to my extended family. What a gift.

Flori... Floridamom96

Then there's, "Don't you have a tv?"

bingo... bingogurl

When they say:

" must be busy"...All I think is ...nope not at all. I am completely bored with planning meals, picking up/dropping off kids at their respectable places of activities, breaking up fights between my boys, staying up to deal with sick kiddos or doing the never ending laundry...All while working from home or going into the office. 

" Are you planning on having more"? Maybe I am and maybe I'm it any of your business? I just hope you're not since you can't seem to handle your 1 child while I am pretty sure I can handle 1 more. 


Freela Freela

I only have three, and am done now, but I always get asked if the third was an accident. I think it's because I have a boy, then a girl, and then another girl, and lots of people seem to assume that once you have a boy and a girl, you stop. She actually was a bit of a surprise, but only due to spacing (I wanted three, but wanted a bit more space between number two and number three), but it always boggles my mind how people who I don't know that well, if at all, are comfortable asking me if I was trying to get pregnant or if my birth control failed or something!

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