7 Ways 1st Grade Has Totally Ruined My 'Perfect' Kid

Rant 18

1st day of schoolBefore the current school year started, I took a deep breath and told myself that even though my son was joining the ranks of the "big kids" by heading into first grade, there was no way I'd lose the sweet little angel I'd poured six years of hard work into simply because he was growing up.

I'd heard of it happening to other parents, you know, the whole "big kid school ruined my baby" thing, but I figured I'd most likely be an exception to the rule because my little guy is pretty darn awesome.

Well, I may have had a "not me, not MY kid" mentality back in September, but today? Yeah, I'll admit that first grade has pretty much ruined him and erased a lot of the effort I put in day after day for the past few years.

And I'm not ashamed to say that I miss the hell out of half-day kindergarten right now -- and don't even get me started on what I'd give to be able to send my son back to the land of sunshine, smiles, and sanity (a.k.a. preschool).

That being said, I'd like to issue a stern warning to all the moms out there who will send a child to big kid school next year. Here are seven ways first grade is totally screwing up my kid.

  1. Swearing -- Sure, I'll be the first to admit that he's picked up a choice term or two from me in the past, but some of the things big kids have said that he's repeated have still left me with my mouth wide open in complete shock. (Big kids can be pretty nasty little you-know-whats.)
  2. He knows what being cool means -- The other night, he told me he wants a new personality because he wants to be cool like the older kids. (Just. Shoot. Me.)
  3. Humiliation -- How do I put this lightly ... my mere existence on this planet is enough to embarrass him at the bus stop. (Sniff, sniff.)
  4. Peer pressure -- Yes, peer pressure has already kicked in. When he sees other kids behaving badly? He figures he can do it too and use the fact that they are doing it as an excuse. (For the record, we're working really hard on fixing this one.)
  5. He's catching on to fashion trends -- He got all bent out of shape the other night because I put fire truck pajamas on him. (Yep, my baby is gone. WTF?)
  6. He's run into friend issues -- I really wasn't prepared for this one quite yet, even though I knew it was inevitable. His best buds from kindergarten are all in the other first grade class, and now they don't play with him as much anymore and it hurts his feelings. (Which makes me want to cry.)
  7. He's holding his own -- Please tell me I'm not the only mom of a 6-year-old who is having issues with him giving me an attitude or back talking me. It's like he's growing into his own little individual with his own opinions -- and he's not afraid to argue with me AT ALL.

Lord have mercy, somebody please give me my baby back. PLEASE.

(And if you feel like reassuring me and telling me that I'm not a shi&%y mom, that would be much appreciated too.)

Did you notice any changes when your child went to first grade?


Image via Mary Fischer

elementary school


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Lisa Gelinas

I wouldn't say 1st grade ruined my child, but I can tell you middle school has done just that!! The amount of swearing and vulgarity is mind blowing!! My son is not the same kid he was before 6th grade...very very sad.

Sili M. Recio

I don't like this list. Because it means it could happen to me and I don't know how I feel about this school business anymore. My child came home the other day and told me she had to wear long socks just like (insert kid name here). Excuse me?! I can't. I just can't.

For the record, you are an awesome mom. I should know because it takes one to know one ;-).

amazz... amazzonia

Homeschool....school doesn't do any good anymore, is just a free babysitting service for parents who don't have time to take care of their child

Sammy... SammyMama

This is one of the reasons I am interested in homeschooling.  My dd is only 3 1/2 but I have so many mom-friends with 5, 6, and 7 year olds who all mourn the loss of their babies for these exact same reasons come their first September of school.  Don't think I'm into that...

Frogy Frogy

I didn't have any issues, I put my son in preschool at 3 and a half he adjusted well.  I've not really had to senor his well being.  I set boundaries with consequences. I was his mother his friend and I would put a boot in it if I had too!  He knew this, he is 23 years old now, and a well rounded individual. I am very proud of him. 

Advice, if I can socialize your kids....dont' just keep a small circle of friends.  Get the kids out there, don't be afraid of them taking changes at the play ground and making friends.

Just my 2 cents

Lacresha Graham

YESSSS!!  This is exactly my exprience.  My son wore a scarf the entire day yesterday because he thought it was fashionable and "cool" and "all the girls noticed". Seriously? He won't tell me he loves me anymore when I drop him off and will only hug me before bed or when he is hurt. He came home crying one day because the older kids were calling him "smally' (his dad is 5'6" and 130 pounds & my dad is 6' and 130 pounds - the kid is screwed) and he was the one who was caught during the "punch each other in the balls" game and was sent to the principle's office.  Yes...  first grade has done wonders for my little man AND I put him in preschool when he was two weeks past 3 years old AND I set boundaries and consequences AND my son will still be well rounded.  :) 


Tom Megginson

It's called socialization. Your hothouse flower needs to get transplanted out with the weeds eventually.

Hocke... HockeyMomNJ

I'm having the exact same experience. My lovely 6 year old first grader told me that "math sucks" the other day. He wants a mohawk, because the cool kids have them. He has no fear of arguiung with me either. Where did my baby go????

nonmember avatar Jewelzlady

My daughter just turned six and started full day kindergarten this year. She has been in preschool since 2 1/2. I've always kept a close eye on her, very easy since I was a teacher in her school. I knew it would be hard not being there all day and it was part of her growing up.... But whoa.... I never expected my daughter who used to be the teacher helper and perfectly mannered angel to change sooo much. Talking back, how to dress, being the boss, and not to mention being but on orange and a special " talk" from the teacher? Never expected that!! Big kid school totally changed my daughter... Glad I'm not the only one!

Akash... AkashaGermaine

Not everyone can homeschool. I know I'd suck at it. I'm also glad my daughter's school has uniforms. That being said, my daughter started doing this last year in kinder.

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