Transgender 3rd Grader Wants to Pee With the Girls & Her School Should Let Her

Say What!? 74

little girls feetAn elementary school in New Hampshire says it's welcoming a transgendered third-grader as a girl. The child will be able to use the girls' restroom, will dress like a girl, and will be addressed as a girl at school. Janson Wu, the lawyer who helped her parents reach an agreement with her new school, says accommodating transgendered students is new territory for everyone, but "we're going to see a lot more students coming out. And that's something that schools and parents need to be prepared to deal with."

It sounds like maybe the girl's previous school was not so prepared. She transferred this fall from a different city school. I wonder how many of her teachers and classmates already know if this new student is transgendered -- and if so, how much it matters to them. Will they eventually find out? How exactly is this going to work out in the bathroom?

I'll admit my first thought: A third-grader? How would this child know at such a young age? But I happen to live with a third-grader. I know how willful he is, and how clear he is about his identity. So yeah, I believe this transgendered girl feels strongly about being a girl. Gender identity becomes super important starting around the age of 7. This is definitely the result of her reaching a developmental milestone.

I think her fellow classmates can handle it. But I hope they get support from their parents, too. No parent should be filling their kids' heads with bigoted ideas. This is an opportunity for families to grow compassion. Who knows why there are kids born one gender but feel like they're the other gender? Does it really matter? You should still treat them with dignity and respect. This is an important lesson for all kids (and their parents!) to learn.

So I'm glad the school is accepting this transgendered student. The district superintendent, Mark Conrad, says the agreement between the girl's parents and the school is meant to help the girl thrive in the classroom -- and that's exactly what the school should be focusing on. Girl or boy, it doesn't matter. Let her pee in the girls' bathroom! However this student wants to be identified, it's the school's job to provide her with the best education they possibly can in an environment that doesn't cause her extra stress. I hope it works out.

What do you think of the school's decision to accept a transgendered third-grader?


Image via Robynlou8/Flickr

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mande... manderspanders

I've said it before, and I'll say it again:

Gender Identity Disorder is the ONLY mental illness where therapy encourages following through with the impulse/delusion, INSTEAD OF providing behavioral and coping skills to come to terms with reality. (could imagine if they did this with schizophrenics? or psychopaths?)

That doesn't mean that these people shouldn't be treated with compassion.  But really... feeling like a girl and being a girl are two different things. And if you aren't born with the DNA, then you can never *be* a girl (no matter how much a person can pass for one).  I feel so horribly for these people who end up mutilating their bodies to become something they are not... instead of being able to come to terms with the discrepency and learning to love their body the way it was made.

mande... manderspanders

I also think that a 3rd grader cannot really know what they want because they are unable to process the potential outcome/consequences.  Kids *are* impulse driven, biologically wired that way...  that doesn't mean that we encourage those impulses.  Including making a whole school cater to a supposed "transgendered" girl.


linzemae linzemae

To the people that think he is too young I think when you are that young you are more honest with who you are than when you get older

nonmember avatar Megan

Manders- you are spot on.

nonmember avatar me

My son knew he was spider man when he was 7. He truly believed he wasn't a boy, but spider man. Should I have made the school accommodate his desire?

Rhond... RhondaVeggie

So long as she remembers to put the seat down I have no issue with it. I hope the parents at the school are less bigoted than certain posters here. Any parent that actively encourages their kid to bully another child needs to grow up and develop some sense.

the4m... the4mutts

Linzemae- yes. You're 100% correct. And at that age you change your mind more than you change your underwear. So while they may 100% want to be a girl today, they may 100% want to be a boy tomorrow. And they were honest with themselves today, and tomorrow.

My 8yr old son changed his mind on his favorite pants that I JUST bought him. He begged to have Shawn White skinny jeans for 6 months. I finally took him shopping when I had money, he picked 3 pairs, and I got them, and 2 weeks later, the tags are still on them. He changed his mind.

nonmember avatar Megan

HAHAHA Rhonda. I'm not sure how she put those previous comments from adults and their opinions together as 'actively encouraging kids to bully' (like they need help being bullies), but then in the same breath she goes on to tell you that you are immature and need to get a brain. Rhonda is a bully.

linzemae linzemae

People are commenting about the consequences. So this child shouldn't be who he wants to be because of the narrow minded people. What happened to telling your kids you can do and be anything you want to be.

alway... alwayscurious

Since gender roles(besides the ones that require certain body parts) are largely based on society, I wonder if this child would still want to be a girl if he lived in, say, a country where girls haul water for miles for their families, or are always in danger of being kidnapped and sold. Just a thought........

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