A few weeks ago, the inevitable happened: I turned into my mother.
It happened at Nordstrom Rack where my daughter relentlessly begged for a t-shirt that I refused to buy. "Lily," I calmly said, "I refuse to pay 20 dollars for a shirt that has holes in it. If you want a shirt with holes, go home and rip one that you own."
And then it hit me. My mother had said the exact same thing to me 30 years before. I cried and cried for the acid wash jeans and the holey shirts and she refused. I swore that when I had kids someday, I would buy the trendy clothes for them unlike my mean mother and break this vicious cycle. So, of course, I bought Lily the damn shirt and rolled my eyes the whole time.
Seems I'm not the only one who says things I swore I wouldn't. I posed the question on my Facebook page, and here are my favorite replies. And, yes, I think I've said them all.
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1. Because I said so, that's why!
2. If you make that face for too long, it will stay like that.
3. Life isn't fair, get over it.
4. Go ask your Dad.
5. When I was your age ...
6. I'll give you something to cry about.
7. What part of NO don't you understand?
8. Go away!
9. I'm your mother, not your maid!
10. If you roll your eyes at me again, I'll smack them into next week.
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11. I brought you into this world, I will take you out!
12. Serves you right.
13. Get a grip!
14. I hope you have 10 kids just like you!
15. What's wrong with you???
16. You'll miss me when I'm gone one day, trust me.
17. If you want to act like a little shit, go lay in the yard.
18. You are driving me out of my damn mind.
19. I'm telling your father!
20. Don't make me pull this car over!
21. It's all mine until you're 18, deal with it.
22. I'm not asking you, I'm TELLING you.
23. I don't care what the other kids' parents said, I said no.
24. If all of your friends jumped off a bridge, would you??
25. I am NOT a referee in this house!
What do YOU say that you swore you never would?
Image via Scary Mommy