Blue Ivy's fabulous footwearGood fortune smiled down on little Blue Ivy Carter and delivered her to the richest couple in all of celebritydom, so let’s weigh the variables, shall we? Her parents are stankin’ rich + she’s their first child + she’s a girl (and we all know, whether we’re willing to admit it or not, that girl first children usually get sugary sweet treatment) + Jay-Z’s been waiting to be a papa (despite rumors that he already was).
That all adds up to the science that would explain why eight-month-old Blue Ivy Carter would have custom-made, bedazzled sneakers with a $798 price tag. Just a little something to tide her over until she starts walking, ya know.
Back in the summer, Jay admitted to Oprah that his baby girl was probably going to be the “worst, spoiled little kid ever” and then capped that prediction off with a line on the song “Three Kings” alongside fellow rappers Rick Ross and Dr. Dre: “couldn't f--- with my daughter's room" and they "couldn't walk in my daughters socks.” Considering he also brags about killing the Hermes store in that same guest verse—and factoring in that his wife was spotted shopping with little B.I. on her hip at Bergdorf’s—seems like spoiled might be an understatement.
I’m pretty sure you can add up every pair of shoes I owned from infancy to high school graduation and the net worth wouldn’t even come close to $800. My mama is a frugal woman with the special talent for making a dollar holler. Jay-Z grew up poor too, but he’s lapped me on the track a few times. Just a few.
Still, I’m not so sure I can say if someone handed me a cool couple dozen millions that I would a) be able to stay vertical, much less put together a coherent witticism or b) immediately start showering Girl Child with flashy, pricey gifts and high-end finery. But it’s also so much easier to find yourself overluxuriating a chubby, kissable infant than a loveable but sometimes surly teenager. Sooo not the same thing.
So shop on, Blue Ivy, and we’ll just pray that your temper tantrums are minimal and somebody in that camp will learn how to say “no.” But seriously, I doubt it. In the meantime, I’ll be combing through Goodwill for whenever B.I. grows out of those booties…
If you had long money like Jayonce, would you spend major duckets on baby stuff like, say, $798 shoes?
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