Didja hear? Didja hear? We American parents are totally over-the-top wicked awesome at the whole bragging thing.
No, really! We are so good at talking about how awesomesauce our kids are that the Wall Street Journal wrote a whole article this week about how absolutely impressive we are at annoying the crap out of our fellow parents. But while they put the blame on the instant gratification we get from posting pictures of our kids' exploits on Facebook, I think it's something deeper.
Some parents just thrive on one-upping other parents. The problem is we're all kind of insecure as parents, and the braggy moms and dads know how to push our buttons big time.
Don't want to come across as one of these jerks? We talked to a host of parents about the brags that really get under their skin. Here are the top offenders:
1. The Early Developer. Yes, we get it, your kid lost all her teeth by the end of kindergarten. Unfortunately it will take a whole lot more for her to get into college!
2. The Percentile Pusher. So, your kid is in the 99th percentile ... and your husband is 6'5". Could have seen that one coming ... now let's get on to something that really matters.
3. The Simpatico Siblings. It's nice that your kids get along, but something tells me that all those "perfect" moments you're constantly sharing get forgotten on long road trips. Sibling rivalry is normal, it's OK to admit it happens!
4. The Kids Who Potty Train Themselves. Honey, if she watched you go into the bathroom every day, she was learning from you ... that's part of training. So let's revisit: WHO didn't have to potty train their kid?
5. The Multilingual Toddler. Yes, they can count to 10 in 5 languages thanks to Dora and her pals. No, that will not help you in the least when the whole fam takes a trip to Europe this summer.
6. The Perfectly Behaved Kids. I'm sorry that you've never once had to discipline your daughter. She sounds awfully boring.
7. High Performing Children. Sweetie, are these children or are they car engines?
8. The Kids Who "Need" Extra Everything (Classes, Toys, Whatever). Regarding the word need, let me borrow a phrase from the classic, The Princess Bride: "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."
What are the most annoying things your mom friends brag about?
Image via miggslives/Flickr