I've got a question for your parents: would you rather your kid learned a euphemism for the f-word or read about rape and murder? Go ahead, I'll give you a few seconds. It shouldn't take long. In the meantime, you might want to steer clear of the New York Times.
In a disagreement with website STFU Parents this week, the Grey Lady, she who has long proclaimed herself the place to find "all the news that's fit to print" has revealed its decision that it's not "fitting" to print even the vaguest references to curse words lest they "offend" the venerable newspaper's "younger readers."
Essentially the New York Times has just informed the parents of America that it is far scarier that our kids learn a euphemism for f--k than that they read that three American soldiers were murdered for no reason (on the front page of the website yesterday) or about the man who chopped an 8-year-old boy up into little pieces and stuck him in the freezer (child killer Levi Aron made the NY section yesterday).
Excuse me, parents, if you think the latter is better, please do not send your child to play with mine. I'm not ready to tell my 7-year-old why evil men kill 8-year-old children.
I am OK with a conversation about why certain words are not appropriate in polite company. In fact, we had it just this week. She said "hell" and when I told her it was not a nice word, she mentioned the TV show Hell's Kitchen which her father and I both watch. It developed into an interesting discussion, and we both came out enlightened.
These conversations are what euphemisms were made for ... because we do have to sanitize certain adult things for children, but we can't make them all go away. I find it rather insulting to my intelligence that the Times -- of all places -- is telling parents they can't handle a conversation about the term STFU.
The paper's "policy" came to light this week only because of a story that made reference to STFU Parents' tagline without credit to its source. Blogger B was understandbly upset and wrote to the paper asking for credit for her words. As a writer, I was annoyed on her behalf. As a parent, I'm incensed by the response that they blatantly refuse to use a euphemism for the f-bomb in an effort to protect kids ... even while they told B "Granted, we aren't the parents of young readers."
That's right, newspaper editors are not the parents of our children. Their jobs are to convey the news in a relatively classy way -- hence the use of a euphemism rather than the actual expletive. Our job is to police what our kids read, hear, and see.
So, I don't let my 7-year-old read The New York Times. She isn't ready to learn what happened to poor little Leiby Kletzy at the hands of Levi Aron. But if she hears the name LMFAO on the radio, I'm not going to scream and cry and call the FCC. I'm going to tell her we don't say f--k ... at least not in front of Grandma.
What do you think of the Times' extreme take on protecting our kids from curse words?
Image via GranniesKitchen/Flickr
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Comments 43
Last time I checked rape, murder, and mutilations can happen to ANYONE...so trying to explain that to a child. Me: Ok, Kayden there are people out there that could rape, murder, or torture you for no reason other than they are sick freaks, and you never know who those people are, until it happens. (Then goes in to describe rape, murder and torture)
***My son is automatically scarred for life and scared out of his mind***
Me: Ok Kayden, sometimes adults say swears when they are angry, to express that they are angry. These swears aren't nice to say, you shouldn't say them because sometimes those words make people feel bad or cause people to think you aren't smart. If you are angry express yourself through other words, not those "swear" words. I don't want you repeating that F word your dad said when he stubbed his toe, Ok?
***Understands who uses those words, why they use those words, and why he shouldn't use those words. Goes on about his day***
Yeah, I think I will choose teaching my kid not to say "fuck" or any other "swear" word over trying to explain the horrible things that happen to people anyday.
My son knew from a young age that certain words, although used by others, were not allowed in OUR home. I managed to live to the age of 44 without using curse words, particularly that F word. It has been a good lesson that just because others are doing something doesn't mean we have to. My son is 20 now, I am sure he used some curse words around his friends, but he does not curse around me, his father, my mother, his aunts, or in public. It has nothing to do with age, I do not like to be around ANYONE who uses foul language as it disgusts me. I was raised that cursing was for those who lack a vocabulary and a brain.
no cussing at home
I try not to cuss cause you never know if little ears are listening. But when I get mad one or two will slip out.
My dad hates cuss words. He has told me, more than once, "There are thousands of other words in the English langue, please use one that is NOT a cuss word." One of the guys he used to work with never did get the drift not to cuss around my dad. Dad handed him a dictionary and told him to find another word.
My little brother could tell you "words that we don't say" when he was two. He also was shown "To Catch A Predator" in grade school. Guess what? He is a straight-A student starting college at 16. He has not been abused; he's strong, and extremely careful with info on the net and in person. He knows how to stay safe and does. He's Christian, has his own opinions, and doesn't cuss. Words are just words. Kids will say them more if you flip out and make a huge deal about them. What the NYT is doing is exactly what they fight against -- censorship. As a journalist, I'm astounded and insulted that they would do so. Also, who the hell lets their kid read the NYT? Sure, like I said, the kid saw "To Catch a Predator," but he didn't know what the words meant, just that there were "bad guys" who use the internet "to find and hurt other people." Murderers though? Senseless acts of violence? Really, violence at all that didn't involve Spiderman? Heeecccccckkkkkk no.
GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK! Why do people think cuss words are the "worst words". Fuck is my favorite word and I say all the time in front of my child! It's JUST ANOTHER CUSS WORD! Why is fuck sooo bad? Kids don't see it as much worse than other cuss words unless we teach them it is! My daughter knows all about "grown up words". We don't call them bad words because that sends the wrong message wouldn't u say? On the other hand we DO NOT say...stupid, ugly, fat, retarded, dumb. We never use demeaning words and we don't talk about people. I think that sends a much different message