My kids came home from camp last week with Ziploc bags full of "Goo." That's right, the very camp that I have given up all summer luxuries in order to be able to send my kids to sent them home with a mysterious substance promising nothing but mess and headaches.
I mean, seriously, couldn't they keep that shit at camp where it belongs? It's the equivalent of giving a preschooler a drum-set as a birthday present. You just don't do it. Period. What else don't I want other people giving my children? Read on.
1. Play Doh. My kids love making spaghetti and snowmen and ice cream out of it. I don't so much share their enthusiasm as I scrub it out of carpets and seat cushions for weeks after.
2. Musical instruments. Unless it's a silent instrument, keep it at your own house, please.
3. Slime. A relative of goo, but even more messy. If that's possible.
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4. Legos. There is no pain like that of stepping down, full weight, on a Lego at 4 o'clock in the morning. It's enough for me to outlaw them entirely from the house.
5. Microphones. As if my kids aren't loud enough, without the aid of an instrument.
6. Anything that requires assembly. Unless, of course, you plan on doing the assembly.
7. Toy guns. I tried really hard for years to keep guns away from my boys until I caved with a water gun. Shortly after, a neighbor gave my son a gigantic Nerf gun and life was never the same. Do what you want in your own house, but keep guns away from my kids, thank you very much.
8. Anything involving food. Easy-Bake Ovens aren't that easy and always result in me having to make a real batch of brownies (that aren't baked by light bulb).
9. Puzzles with a million pieces. Because little puzzle pieces seem to mate with socks and disappear in record speed.
10. Anything you wouldn't want your own kid playing with. Of course.
Did I miss anything?
Image via Scary Mommy
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Comments 94
THIS ARTICLE IS MEANT TO BE FUNNY.
JUDGMENTAL MOMMIES.
I guess I hate my self, except guns I buy all that stuff to my kids
The only toys I dislike are those ones that play for the kid. You know those that you press a button and it makes noises and lights up. They are annoying especially when the kid decided to press the button over and over again.
LOL my husband and I are big on giving all these things!!! My husband is also big on chocolate and candy. I was always told Payback's a B*. So far noone has really given my son anything really annoying.
I would love it (or at least not mind it) if people got these things for my kids. And I always love for them to get musical instruments and creative toys like play doh and legos!
So I have scars from Lego injuries, but my sons have a ton of them. They are better now at picking them up and keeping them contained, so not bad in my book. I also love playdoh (In the kitchen, at the table, I even keep it in the kitchen, not with the toys) I agree with everyone about Moon Dough, and I cannot stand when people I know (who therefore know We have a bad on weapons @ our house) buy Nerf guns etc for my kids. And then say things like, "Oh, you're not over that yet?" Guess what? The kids are 14, 13 and 8, I probably am not giong to "get over it" at this point, so deal. I would have no problem with the other things on the list, although please, if you buy a kid a toy that says "batteries not included" on it, please provide batteries. I try try to keep extra laying around, but I never seem to have enough AAs.
Oh, sorry. Forgot to add: I still enjoyed the list :)
Buy some moondough, it will make you appreciate and approve of playdoh. I found some on a clearance rack and thought wow, my kid would love this! And it says its easy to clean up, too!
Needless to say, I found out why it was on the clearance rack. ;)