Would you take your family to a breastaurant? Not familiar with the term? Well, it’s not exactly a restaurant made exclusively for moms who breastfeed, if that was what you were thinking. Though wouldn’t that be wonderful? A restaurant with comfortable gliders in dim lit recesses of the room so that moms could breastfeed their babies in relative comfort while having dinner with the rest of the family. Now, that would be a good idea.
Unfortunately, a breastaurant is a restaurant that sells its food with the gimmick that if you come into the establishment you will be greeted by a bevy of scantily clad, beauties with great breasts a la Hooters, Twin Peaks and the Tilted Kilt. See, definitely does not have anything to do with breastfeeding.
There has been a recent mini-boom of the popularity of the breastaurant with new establishments like Twin Peaks and the Tilted Kilt. These joints are trying to up the ante on Hooters by offering more extensive menus, versatile costumes and even trying to class up the joint. Tattoos, piercings and outrageously dyed hair will not be tolerated. Hey, you with your tits hanging out, cover up that tattoo! It’s gaudy. You want people to think you're trashy?
These types of places used to cater exclusively to men but apparently with the new menu and family-friendly atmosphere, it’s perfectly normal to see men with their kids having lunch. (I bet Daddy didn't tell Mommy where he was taking the kids for lunch that day).
I don’t consider myself a prude but honestly, I’m not crazy about the idea of my husband comparing my assets to the cute co-ed in the push-up bra. Isn’t that what strip clubs are for? I’ve breastfed for God’s sake. I’d prefer that my husband just buy me the costume. I’ll shove my tits in his face and gladly accept a tip other than just the standard slap on the ass. Mama needs some new shoes.
I don’t care how good the food is. With all the T & A flying around, I am sure we’d all be too distracted to eat anything.
Would you take your family to a breastaurant if the food was great and the prices were good?
Image via Joe Osterloh/ Flickr